Just like 2015, 2018 was the year of weddings. Three sets of friends got married this year, and it was quite the experience. Actually, it was more than just an experience, it was a long year of experiences. Honestly, I could write for hours and hours about how different each of these wedding experiences was for me and how different they were from each other, but perhaps another day…
I am going to dedicate this blog entry on the last of the weddings I attended this year. But before we get to September 2018, I want to take you back a little bit.
I became friends with the groom in 2007 while we were both attending Nipissing University. I won’t elaborate on how our friendship evolved over time, but I will highlight some key points. When I met the groom, we instantly clicked. We had the same type of humour, were both history majors (and nerds), and had many shared interests. Like any good relationship, the more you get to know each other the more you learn new things not only about each other but because of each other. When you’re away from home, the friendships you form at school instantly mean that much more because those friends become your second family. You become very attached to these people, at least I did.
Summers were hard. You got used to seeing these people so often over the school year; they lived in the same building as you or you had the same classes, and they could come over at any time and stay over until 4 am, even if you had 8:30 am class the next day. Those bonds and those friendships are even more special because they are tested and tested in the most stressful of circumstances; not only are you away from home, buried in homework, essays or exams, but you’re also under pressure to make the most of your time at school while also buckling down so that you can graduate and get settled into your career. Ugh, more on that in a future post…
The years at Nipissing passed and we found ourselves graduated and living on the opposite ends of the province; okay a tad dramatic but we were living over 5 hours away. Luckily, my graduate program landed me in Kingston, so for a year we actually only lived 2 hours away – and you bet we made the most of it! But there did come a time again where we were indeed 5 hours apart, catching up over iChat (whoa, do I sound uncool?) or long elaborate facebook posts or messages, and phone calls too! Regardless we did our best to stay connected and involved in each other’s lives.
I am so thankful that we were able to stay friends through all those years and all those experiences. I am even more thankful that as the years continue to pass that we are able to share even more experiences and memories. I would be lying if I said that being asked to be the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding was a surprise to me, but nevertheless being asked was still heartwarming and flattering.
When I was asked to be the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding, it wasn’t a surprise to me because I knew the kind of friendship we had, and of course most people want their best friends to stand by their side on their wedding day, and I was delighted to be one of those best friends. Anyone who knows the groom would also not be surprised by this choice, yet it blew my mind how many random people still found this concept so shocking.
The number of times I heard the comment, “Really? The Best Woman? That’s interesting…”  or “Oh, there’s no Best Man? Hmmm.” and even, “Well what does the bride think about that? That’s not traditional.” was alarming. Is it really surprising to people that in 2018 men and women can be best friends? Why is society still stuck in these traditional wedding rules and expectations? And why does anyone who does anything “non-traditional” have to justify or explain themselves?
The truth is this. Being the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding was one of the best experiences of my life. When I got married, the amount of love and support I felt from my wedding party was incredible. I promised myself that if I ever got asked to be in another wedding party that I would do everything I could to make them feel as loved and special as my wedding party made me feel. I have had the privilege of being at several weddings, be it as a bridesmaid, maid of honour, matron of honour and now the best woman. The greatest thing about taking on these roles is getting to see all the behind the scenes moments leading up to the moments that everyone else gets to see. Not only do you witness these behind the scene moments, but you get to be part of making them too.
The adventures leading up to my friend’s wedding were magnificent. As a trio, we were able to take a road trip to Myrtle Beach and make hundreds of new memories and inside jokes. We relived some of our fondest undergrad memories by revisiting old stomping grounds’ and we continued to have fun and be ridiculous. This friendship was such a journey; it had many pit stops along the way to get us to the big day in September. We didn’t stop believing, and we held onto that feeling… yes that was totally a Journey reference!
The wedding day was magic. Three friends sharing drinks, laughs, rocking out to Tom Petty, Hall & Oates, and many other 80s tracks, while reflecting on the moments that got us to that very day.
Being the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding was years in the making. If you would have asked me in 2007 if I thought I would be there the day he got married, I would have said yes. Sometimes you just know, and I knew from the day I met him, that he was a friend for keeps. I know that he will read this blog, so when he does there is just one last thing to say:
Thank you! Thank you for giving me the honour of being one of the Best Women in your life. Asking me to be your Best Woman wasn’t a role that concluded when September ended. I have been and will continue to be one of those people you can count on today and every tomorrow.
Five Feet High Thoughts 