Tag: personal blog

I’m Really Not A Morning Person and That’s Okay.

manda_faromeiro

You’ve heard it before, and so have I. Yep. I’ve read many articles and have received much advice from adults and teachers and responsible people alike about the benefits of getting up early and why people who wake up earlier tend to be more productive. I also know there are counter-arguments on this topic, and while I am not here to debate the pros and cons of waking up early, I am here to share my own insights on why I myself will never be a morning person, and why I am totally okay with this.

I am sure you’ve all met those people who might be coined as “Nighthawks,” those individuals who rather than getting up early in the morning, sleep in and stay up very late into the later hours (after 11pm). My brother and I had an interesting conversation about this recently, and how we both are firm believers that sometimes you’re just wired a certain way and how some of us will never be those early birds. I know habits and routines can change, and I even had a period a few years ago where I was getting up at 6:30 am every day for work, and honestly, I really hated it. Even getting up for school in the morning was dreadful, if it happened before 7:45 am.

Ever since I can remember, I have always been the most productive in the evenings. When I was in high school, in addition to after-school sports and clubs, I also had a job. This meant that at least 3 school nights a week, I wasn’t getting home until 9:30 pm. Of course, I had to then start my homework, have a shower, and possibly have some leisure/downtime if time allowed. Basically, I wasn’t going to bed before midnight unless my school workload was lightened. Completing my homework so late wasn’t ever a drag for me, and I always found I had this burst of energy after coming home from work. It seemed that my most creative thoughts and ideas would come about after dark, and my concentration was at an all-time high. I attribute this to many things.

After being at school for 6 or so hours and focusing all day long, it is important to give your brain a break. For me, these breaks included going to work, but also participating in activities like sports or drama club, or even hanging out with my friends. My parents were pretty lenient in that they always understood that we always got our homework done, so finishing our homework before going out with friends wasn’t a necessary rule in our house. My parents knew that if I didn’t get home until the evening, or if I had friends come over, my homework would get done regardless. I have always had strong organizational/time management skills so trying to find a work/school/social life balance never was hard for me. Having a few hours break between after school and homework time allowed my brain to focus better on completing those tasks and thinking about what material I learned throughout the day. For those days where I had nothing going on after school, I still found myself not working on any homework until well after supper; the only exception to this was group projects or studying for tests or exams.

Some of you are probably reading this thinking, no teenager likes getting up early in the morning, so what? Well, for me, this wasn’t just a phase of puberty. I really liked to work in the evening and into the night. When I went off to university, 8:30 am classes were hell for me. I tried so hard to get into routines of waking up at the same time every day, going to bed at the same time every night, planning activities for the morning, leaving sections of time in the morning to ease myself into waking up earlier, but nothing was sticking. I went through a phase where I would work on any readings, essays or projects in the morning and earlier part of the day so that my evenings could be free. This was met with limited success. I found myself taking almost twice as long to get anything done, compared to when I would start after 6pm. Finally, I stopped fighting it and started listening to what my internal clock was telling me; my brain worked best late in the day.

I cannot even begin to tell you how much more work I got done in university once I completely accepted that my brain’s primetime was after supper hours and that this didn’t need to change. Yes, I’m not going to lie, there were quite a few 8:30 am classes that I outright missed or slept through, and while I struggled not to feel guilty about missing school (nerd alert), I found that getting up later, catching up on content via the textbook with the aid of my friends’ notes, was more productive for me than sitting in the classroom listening to my professor talk for 1.5 hours straight first thing in the morning. I wouldn’t go as far as saying that I hate mornings, but I am not the best version of myself in the morning. It’s not that I can’t function as a person before 10 am, because I can, but I am at my most productive, enthusiastic and happy later in the day.

As I mentioned briefly above, at my old job, I had to wake up for work at 6:30am every day. I only worked 20 minutes away, so commuting wasn’t ever a real concern. A full school year went by under this schedule and it never got any easier. Sometimes I enjoyed finishing work at 4:30 instead of 6pm or later, but any chance I had to switch to a later shift, I would jump on it in an instant. I recognize that while I am a very talkative and happy person in general, I am not this person in the morning. Waking up in the morning is a process for me. I need time to process the alarm going off (sometimes 3 or 4 or 5 times) and getting the day started. I recognize that if I need to be “out of bed” by 7am that I really should start my alarm at 6:30 so that I have intervals to seize the day and get out of bed. I bet some people are reading this thinking how terrible this is for me and how much worse it is to set so many alarms, and while science probably agrees with you, this method is honestly what works for me. I don’t drink coffee, and while many have suggested this would help me to wake up, I don’t want to rely on caffeine to keep me alert. Instead, I take my time waking up. At my old job, I was required to be “on” early in the morning. Working with children, you don’t really get the chance to sit and be calm in the morning, you have to be all in; this means you’ve got to be talking, interacting, sharing ideas, playing, asking questions, and helping them learn new concepts and ideas. While some of the kids definitely made getting up earlier a little easier, I always found my afternoon classes ran much better because I was more alert and seemed to have the most creative ideas for projects and activities.

Taking the time to “wake up” was and still is an interesting concept to me because while I do need time to ease into the morning, I also cannot have a morning that drags on. Basically, I need to wake up with just the right amount of time to get dressed, get makeup on, maybe eat breakfast at home (or stop on the way to work) and that’s pretty much it. Any other lull in time tends to make the process of being alert and ready for the day that much longer. In general, I enjoy being busy so I think this is a good reason for it, but also focusing on all the things I have to do for the day kicks my brain into gear. The drive to work is a good time for me to become more awake and ready to conquer the day too, even if its only 15 or 20 minutes, it allows me to not have to engage in conversation, but ease into listening to some music or a podcast and get ready for whatever interactions I might be met with for the day. Of course, this doesn’t mean that I’m not productive at work in the morning, I can definitely be when I need to be, but if you want me at my best, most creative, insightful and delightful, perhaps come engage with me around lunchtime?

Now that I am 30 and can’t hide from being an adult and all the responsibilities that come with it, sometimes I can’t help but feel the societal pressure to become a morning person and seize the day as early as possible, because how can you really be an “adult” if you struggle to get up before 8 am? Well, it used to bother me. When I graduated and started my career I used to think there was something wrong with me because I still hated to (and struggled to) get up early. I thought that eventually, I would get used to waking up early and going to bed at a “decent” hour, which I think is before 10 pm? People still remind me that sleeping until 7:30 or 8 or 8:30 is too late for an adult, especially because I don’t work a job that requires me to work until 1 am or whatever late night shift, but I don’t know what else to say other than it’s just the way I am. I no longer worry about being a late riser, it doesn’t bother me, despite those who want to make me feel bad about it. I accept that I am not a morning person, nor do I want to be. Sure, I’ll wake up early when I need to (work, making an appointment, catching a flight, or when it’s better to do so (like when on vacation or a trip) but my preference is still late evenings over mornings.

Understanding my own strengths and weaknesses when it comes to getting up early was and still is a work in progress. As I said, there are times that call for early mornings, and it’s not as though I am totally unbearable when I do have to get up early, but I thrive in the later parts of the day. I can get up early if I need to, and all “fine, but I’m going to complain the whole time” jokes aside, the mindset is a key factor here. Being an early riser is doable, and for me, it just needs to have a purpose and needs to feel fulfilling. If I can say with confidence that waking up earlier than my normal is necessary because ______________, then I won’t dread it as much. Mindset is also relative to mood. Maybe a contributing factor to dreading those 6:30 am work mornings was attributed to something about my job? Maybe not?

It is quite an interesting rabbit hole to crawl into, but for now, how about a nap?

Just kidding! Thanks for reading.

A Board Game Appreciation (and Recommendation) Post

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Many people have set New Year’s Resolutions, or for those who do not like to call them resolutions, New Year’s Goals. I’ve never been the type to make resolutions, but I do promise myself to continue trying new things as the year goes on and to do more of what I enjoy. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, 2018 was a very busy year, so busy in fact that I had very little time to do the little things I enjoy; like playing board games.

Board games are a pastime that I thoroughly enjoy, and it has become a staple at almost every hangout with my friends. My collection of games has grown immensely and anyone who has been over to my house can tell you for certain that there is definitely something for every type of gamer. Over the last several years, there has been a real resurgence in the popularity of board games; board game cafes are popping up in many areas and group party games like Cards Against Humanity seem to be beloved by all, even those who may not own any other games on their shelves. I really appreciate these board game cafes because they allow people to become reacquainted with some old favourites, or even try something new without having to outright buy the game themselves. These cafes have presented many fun new games that I’ve since added to my own collection and because of these cafes, it has become easier for me to pinpoint the kind of board game I thoroughly enjoy playing.

For me, board games are a wonderful way to not only pass the time, but test your whits, work on your strategy, escape to new worlds, or simply just unwind and have fun. I enjoy all levels of board and card games whether they are party style, team-based, strategy, cooperative, negotiation, guessing games, trivia, or word games. With so much variety and style of gameplay, how could you not enjoy playing games? It is very easy to get lost in all the choices, and it can even be overwhelming to branch away from the standard games we all grew up playing like Monopoly, Scrabble, Guess Who, and Yahtzee. This is why I think those board game cafes are very important!

While the New Year is only 5 days in, I can say with much joy that I have been able to partake in quite a few games board (and card) games already. Games like Catan, Blokus, Fluxx, Exploding Kittens, SET, Powergrid, King of Tokyo, and Sheriff of Nottingham, just to name a few. I could truly write a separate blog entry on each of the games I play the most often, and why you should really give them a chance if you haven’t already, but I thought that since I am just beginning to explain the joy of playing board games, that I will provide just a short list of games that are interesting and fun to play. So here we go…

Settlers of Catan
Yep. Anyone who knows me knows how much I really love this game. For those who don’t know, Catan is a multi-player game (anywhere from 3-6 players) where players assume the roles of settlers, each attempting to build and develop settlements and cities, while trading and acquiring resources. Players gain points as their settlements grow; the first to reach a set number of points, typically 10, wins. Catan became an instant favourite for me, and the added bonus of so many different expansion sets really adds a variety of new elements to the basic gameplay. Some of the expansions allow for settlements to take place across the sea, while others have you battling pirates or traitors, and even having to work together with your enemies to build up your armies of knights and fight off the pirates trying to take over your settlements. It is difficult to become bored with Catan, simply because there are so many variants that change up the outcome of the game. There is even an option where you can combine some of the expansions together and make an intense board consisting of a 42″ x 33″ playing space (pictured below). Now, some of you might be thinking that Catan is simply too long of a game and you don’t want to be playing for hours on end. Honestly, you are partially right. I’ve played so many games of Catan, I’ve seen the game be as quick as 25 minutes, or as long as 5 hours and 20 minutes. It all depends on the variants, the number of players, and how quickly the players take their turns. I highly recommend it though, at least give it a chance.

OrganATTACK!
For anyone unfamiliar with The Awkward Yeti- Heart & Brain Comics, google them right now! Nick Seluk created the most hilarious, heartwarming comic about the organs in our bodies and how they react and interact with each other during a day-to-day experience. Thanks to Kickstarter, he was able to create a quick-play card game based off of our organs. OrganATTACK is all about trying to remove your opponents’ organs before they remove yours. The last person to still have at least one organ is the winner! Players use related afflictions to attack their opponents (for example, playing Gallstones on Gallbladder). Apart from how sweet the drawings are, this game is loads of fun mostly because of how simple it is to learn and how quickly you become hooked. OrganATTACK is an instant favourite because each hand you are dealt is different, and the draw pile is full of various action cards that can totally turn the game around, including a poison card which instantly kills one of your organs! Seriously give it a chance, I promise you’ll be laughing and have a great time playing.

Ticket to Ride
Like Catan, Ticket to Ride became an instant favourite in my board game collection. The objective is to build train routes to various cities and ultimately collect the most number of points based off of the routes and cities you connected. Each player starts the game off with a minimum of two destination tickets and you can acquire more if you choose, but you won’t know the other destinations your opponents are trying to connect; most routes only have one path so you have to plan accordingly. You are able to create a train route once you’ve collected the appropriate number of cards in the appropriate colour (i.e. 4 yellow cards). Ticket to Ride also has different versions that introduce new twists, but mostly just give you a brand new board to build on (i.e. Europe or Germany or New York City). Playtime runs about one hour, but you’ll be surprised how fast that hour will go by when you’re focused on connecting your train routes from Seatle to El Palso.

Dutch Blitz
I was introduced to this game from a Reddit Gift Exchange that I participated in back in 2017. I gifted this game to someone and their feedback on it was so positive that I thought to try it out myself.
The objective of Dutch Blitz is to score points by playing as many cards as possible on Dutch Piles, and by emptying the Blitz Pile as quickly as possible. This is done by playing cards from the Blitz Pile, Post Piles, and Wood Pile on the Dutch piles. It may sound confusing, and at first, I was a little confused, but once you look closer at the instruction sheet and see how the piles are set up, it is very easy. Dutch Blitz is an absolute hoot to play! The cool thing about this family-friendly fast-paced game is that all players are playing their cards at the same time. The quick pacing of the gameplay coupled with the fact that you can have up to 8 players at a time, makes the game a whole lot of fun. Each round lasts anywhere from 3-7 minutes depending on the skill level or intensity level of those you are playing with; many times I’ve played this game with friends it has gotten to the point where everyone stands up in anticipation of seeing where they can play their cards. I honestly think this game is great for all ages and all intensity levels. Also, it is very inexpensive on Amazon – my copy plus the expansion pack cost me only $10.00.

As I said above, I could go on and on listing games that I thoroughly enjoy playing, but I am confident that these four have been a good start. I chose these four not only because they are my favourites, but also because of the style of play; I thought that discussing two longer paced more strategy based games and then two short-play quicker games would be a good way to get a conversation going about the variety of games that exist. My goal for 2019 is to continue trying new board and card games, while also taking more time to play those that I really enjoy playing and have a lot of fun doing so. Yes, this includes old school favourites like Monopoly, Clue, and Risk- we still play these in my house!

What are some of your favourite board games or card games?

Pinkies Up: A Tea-Time Appreciation Post

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Once upon a time, I only drank tea when I was feeling under-the-weather or dealing with an unhappy digestive system or an upset stomach. I never envisioned that one day I would open my kitchen cupboard to find a plethora of tins and canisters filled with assorted flavours of loose leaf and bagged tea. Like most things, my appreciation for tea did not happen overnight. Oh, and yes, I will tell you the tale of how I came to really enjoy having a cup of tea, at almost any time of day.

As I said above, I only ever drank tea to soothe any uneasy feelings I might have been experiencing, or if I was sick. As someone who never really enjoyed hot beverages anyway (I am not a coffee drinker nor do I enjoy hot apple cider or anything like that), whenever I was offered a beverage, it hardly was a warm one, and if it was, it was hot chocolate. In my house, tea was always readily available, and my mom often drank tea and so did our guests. I recall having the typical varieties like Orange Pekoe, Earl Grey, Chamomile, Green, Peppermint, and English Breakfast. Now I know you avid tea drinkers are reading this thinking about all the different varieties under those I just listed, and I understand there are also subcategories like brands as well as loose-leaf tastes vs pre-bagged, but I am trying to keep it simple for the sake of this blog. Anyway, exposure to tea was not the issue, it was simply a matter of preference.

When I ventured off to university, many of my friends and classmates would bring Thermus’ filled with coffee or tea to classes, more often than not, as going to school in North Bay means you’re basically in the cold the whole entire school year. The odd time, a friend and I would head over to Twiggs and grab a small snack and a beverage, but even still I rarely chose tea, and if I did, it was always under the category of Green Tea. I always understood that there was such an assortment of tea flavours, and depending on whether you wanted green, herbal, black, white, oolong, or whatever, that list got more complex. One could really get lost in all the choices, and picking the wrong kind over and over again could really leave a bitter taste in your mouth. Alas, the university days were over and I tea still wasn’t my go-to beverage but there were people in my life who really wanted it to be…

Finding something you love and wanting to share that experience with those around you is something we all do from time to time, so friends of mine who really enjoyed tea (and the oh-so-many selections to choose from) often encouraged me to try all sorts of options; especially on those late night hangouts while we were playing board games or watching movies. By 2015, I had started branching off and trying new flavours like fruit flavoured teas, but I wasn’t ready to indulge in flavours like S’Mores or Popcorn; those are foods, not beverages, how could they possibly make sipping them as good as munching them? How unnecessary…

In 2016 a friend and I had been talking about some things we wanted to try for the new year that we had never done before. One of the things on both our minds was trying new foods and food-like experiences. I expressed to my friend that a co-worker of mine was telling me all about her High Tea experience when she was visiting England with a friend over the summer, and it sounded very intriguing. She agreed that she would love to go, and so we made it happen.

As someone who wasn’t well versed in the tea game, experiencing High Tea was enjoyable for many reasons. First, the lady who ran the tea-shop was very friendly and was able to describe and explain the types of tea she offered in a way that was simple to follow and easy to match up your preferred tastes. Secondly, the atmosphere of High Tea really brought to life why tea-time was such a lovely experience: having a pot of tea alongside some finger foods and good company in a quiet setting was soothing for the soul. Seriously. Most of us don’t realize how little time we take to take to stop and eat, drink, and socialize – in a calmer, cozier atmosphere than at the restaurant chain down the street. The experience of High Tea allowed me to really be present in the conversations we were having and to really savour and relish in the different types of foods and snacks; it was such a well-rounded experience for me as a whole.

As the months went by, I decided I would try a new flavour of tea at least once a month. I realize as I write this that it would have been helpful to have written down all the new flavours I have tried, but once you start branching out, you really begin to develop a sense of what you do like or prefer. It might sound odd to some of you reading this, but the trial of High Tea reaffirmed the importance of giving something another chance; like an old hobby or pastime, what once was could once again be something beloved, simply by trying again (oh-and having the right company too- this one plays more of a role than you might think). A few of us even began hosting our own versions of High Tea time, and it was tea-lightful (look, a pun!)

A year and some has gone by since my first High Tea experience, and I am pleased to say that I have had the opportunity to experience many more, including a special High Tea at Casa Loma in Toronto! Appreciation for tea time was carried over to home, as the home collection of tea selection began to grow. I began to buy some take-home boxes or tins of the teas I tried during these High Tea experiences, and then I finally started paying closer attention to the tea aisle at the grocery store and even began walking into David’s Tea shops at my local malls. Before I knew it, tea fever had already begun to spread, and the cupboard was filling up with teas galore!

I encourage you, even if you don’t care for tea too often to try a High Tea at least once; there are more options around you than you might think and each experience is totally different. If that isn’t your cup of tea, (yes another pun!) then perhaps you can stop by your local tea shop and try a cup by random, tea roulette could be kinda fun?

By no means am I a tea sommelier. I cannot offer any advice on what are the best teas for “beginners” and I can’t say that I have even begun to get the brewing temperature and timing just right; it really is a process and such a science! But I can honestly say that tea has become quite enjoyable for me, and it too was a process. Sometimes, I still find the choices to be overwhelming and find myself sticking to similar realms of flavours; anything with peach seems to be golden for me! With such a collection growing in my cupboard, every time a friend comes over and wants a cup of tea, my hope is that they are inspired by the selection to try something new, or perhaps partake in one of their favourites. And if not, that’s okay too!

Is there something you never really cared for in the past that you now really enjoy?

My First Fashion Themed Blog Post

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I never thought I’d see the day when I would write a blog about fashion. One thing that I have always loved about having my own personal style is how people can look at an article of clothing or an accessory and think, “Oh Yeah! That is totally something Amanda would wear!” It is flattering when people see something and think of you, especially because style and fashion isn’t something I ever thought long and hard about defining for myself. I always believed that if you liked something then you should just wear it.

Growing up, I had many different fashion phases. Most notably, I certainly went through a skater phase and punk rock phase (without the multi-coloured hair), and also a sporty phase. At the moment, I never considered these to be phases because they simply paralleled my interests. Once upon a time, I used to skateboard, just like I was quite athletic and very into sports; specifically basketball. I also went through a dressy/professional phase, well before I was a professional. It sounds strange to word it that way but it’s true. I really enjoyed collared shirts, dress pants, ties, and the like. There was a time where I didn’t own a single pair of jeans for about 10 years… only dress pants and shorts made up my lower-body wardrobe. Fascinating…

Like fashion should be, my fashion was simply an expression of my tastes, likes, and interests. Looking back, what interests me the most is seeing how many of my “fashion phases” overlapped each other and now that I am an adult (or so I am told because I’ve levelled up past my 20s) I see elements of these phases coming out in my closet; I love it! As I’ve mentioned before, confidence is not something I ever really lacked, so choosing clothes was always a fun process for me because I never really thought about following fashion rules or styles. Again, If I liked something, I bought it and coordinated into the other pieces of clothing I had in my closet.

When I think about my own style and tastes, I think about the articles that I am most drawn towards. If I think about what is most consistent for me, it’s simple: shoes & sunglasses. There is nothing more satisfying than when you find a killer pair of shoes and an awesome pair of shades. I can say with confidence that these are the two articles of clothing/fashion that I am most well known for having many of and for consistently wearing the most.

This year, I added a new article to this list. This year I became obsessed with jackets. Oh, it’s true, it’s damn true. Something about jackets really spoke to me this year, and I can’t pinpoint the moment it happened, but next thing I knew I had about 6 new jackets in my closet when I realized that I was officially obsessed. Just like shoes and sunglasses, jackets are a beloved article of fashion for me – and writing this blog made me realize why. These three articles of fashion speak to me because of their versatility. All of these items can be dressed up or dressed down, and add that extra flair to any outfit; at least that’s how I feel about them! If fashion is supposed to make a statement, that’s just what these three articles of fashion do for me.

What I love about my own style is that it pulls from a variety of influences; whether it be pop culture, a particular decade, or simply what speaks to me when I see it hanging on a rack. I can’t speak to what is super trendy or in style, but I do know what I like. I hope that whatever your style, you truly own it and continue to love how you look & feel in it because honestly, that is what fashion should really be about.

The beautiful thing about fashion is that it’s always evolving, changing yet being reborn again. Who would have thought that we’d be so happy for bright colours and neon to come back in style? Or is that just me?

What articles of fashion (clothing or accessories) are your go-to pieces? What do you feel most confident in? Where do you draw your fashion influences from?

How I Came Around to Enjoying Art

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When I was in school, Art was always my least favourite subject. As a student, I was always up for a challenge, but there was something about the art class that always made me cringe. I guess I should clarify, I am referring specifically to the visual arts (drawing, painting, pottery etc.) as I have been and always will be a drama kid; as for music, I cannot play an instrument to save my life…

What always stressed me out about art class was the expectations. The balance of mastering the techniques while also adding your own creative flair to whatever art piece you were working on, always made art class very stressful for me. Getting good grades was always important to me, yes, I was a nerd that way, so while most people felt relaxed and excited about art class, I was dreading it.

Anyone who knows me knows that confidence is not something that I lack. Yet, I was never confident in my artistic abilities, most specifically with drawing and painting. I was relieved that I never had to take another art class in my life after Grade 9, but then I reached the final year in my Concurrent Education program at Nipissing, and I was required to take Art as one of my teachable subjects (yay for choosing the elementary stream!) – such sarcasm…

Once again, I found myself faced with the stress and nervousness I felt in school during art class. I didn’t feel my skills were up to par, and if I couldn’t produce a good sample of art, how would I ever teach the skills and techniques? That art class in Nipissing was truly dreadful for me, especially because our final assignment was to design a portfolio showcasing a variety of different mediums and skills learned throughout the semester. The only project I took any pride in was an Art Integration Assignment, where we had to create a piece of art that blended two sections of the curriculum together. My friend and I chose Art & Grade 7 Geography and created this Model of the Nile River. Truth be told, the only reason I was happy with it was that I myself had done the exact same project when I was in Grade 7, so I already had an idea of how it was going to turn out; I had already done all the trial and error stuff when I was a kid…is that considered cheating?

Nipissing University J/I Visual Arts Class 2010

Long story short, I didn’t fail the class, and actually ended up with a very decent mark, but I was still so glad it was over and I would hopefully never have to do art ever again…until December 2012.

Remember when there was that whole thing about the world ending in 2012? Well, my friends and I had an “It’s the End of 2012, Not the End of the World” party, and my friend thought it would be cool to paint and make t-shirts. Sounds fun right? Well, once again, all these horrible memories of trying to perfect techniques and get your brush strokes just right came flooding over me. I realize as I write this that I am sounding very much like a perfectionist, and a tad dramatic, but this is honestly how much I detested art. Anyway, I went along with it, but you better believe I complained the whole time.

2012 Art Night with Friends…

The night was fun, but not because of the art. After this, my one friend, in particular, continued to tease me about how whiny I was about “art class” and that one day I would learn to enjoy making art. He might read this, and he already knows, but he was right. In years to come, I would grow to really like art, and here’s how that happened.

In Summer 2014 I worked a Summer Camp and we had the opportunity to take the kids on many field trips throughout the summer. One of the trips was to Creative Cafe in Barrie. If you don’t know what Creative Cafe is, look it up, it’s amazing. Here, the students got to experiment with painting their own pottery pieces. Seeing how excited and creative the kids were getting really got me thinking. Most of the kids were really excited about designing the colours and patterns and were quite polite and encouraging to each other about how cool their designs looked. It was touching to see how much fun they were having and it really hit me: that was how art was supposed to be.

It would still be a few years before I really gave art a chance. In early 2017, I partook in one of those Paint Nite events in town. I truly had mixed emotions about the whole thing. What I did not know about Paint Nite before agreeing to sign up was that the painting was predetermined depending on the night you chose; I felt that I could do a pretty good job if it was a landscape or something without a face or too much detail. You better believe the painting that night was an owl, so I really was being tested here. I sat down in front of my easel and tried my best to remember that this was all for fun and everyone’s painting would look a little different, and that was okay. It was more than okay. That was the whole point. As the teacher went through the steps and did her best to explain how to achieve certain brush strokes or how to properly mix the colours together to get the right shades, I found myself getting less and less excited and more and more nervous. It was happening again, I was being far too hard on myself trying to achieve such a perfect piece of art. It was a shitty feeling. I was supposed to be having fun with my friends!

Snow Owl Paintings – January 2017

When I got home that night, my husband asked me how it went and if I was happy with my painting. Right away I was very hard on myself. I started to laugh and I said, “Well, it’s not horrible, but it’s not really that great.”  I reluctantly turned the canvas over to show him. As he glanced at it, it felt like minutes went by before he said anything (it was really about 3-5 seconds). Confused, he looked at me and said, “What’s wrong with it? I like it. He’s got a lot of fur to keep him warm. He’s a snow owl isn’t he?” I couldn’t help but laugh. My husband is always very supportive, wonderful, and truthful. If something didn’t look right, he would say it. I wanted to believe him that it was actually a nice painting, but I still had my doubts. I set it down on the table to finish drying and told him that I would think of a place to put it in the next few days.

The next day I went to work. When I came home that night, I opened the front door and when I stepped inside my foyer, I noticed something new hanging on the wall. My husband greeted me and had the cutest little smirk on his face. I looked at the wall and looked at him. “You hung up my painting?” I asked him with much joy (and some confusion) in my voice. He replied, “Of course. Art is supposed to be hung on the wall. Besides, I really like this.”  It was one of the best compliments I had ever been given in my whole life. I was hit with many feelings at that moment. It occurred to me that I was so critical on my skills when I absolutely had no reason to be. The grading process of art was over, it was time to just roll with it and have fun. There was much fun to be had.

Eventually, I returned to Creative Cafe and tested out my skills with pottery. Pottery led to mosaics, and mosaics led to more paintings. Over time (and with each new art project) art was enjoyable. Art was fun. Art was relaxing and peaceful; it allowed me to be calm and just enjoy the steps and process at my own pace. It was a long journey, but I am very glad that it ended up here. Most importantly, I was reminded not to take myself too seriously and enjoy the little things. These were things I already thought that knew, and I did, just not when it came to art!

2018: A Year in Review

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A few years ago I started a tradition on Facebook; I made the conscious effort to reflect and highlight some of the positive things that I experienced throughout the year. When I started the post, I did so because it seemed that the internet (and almost everyone on it) was having a pretty shitty year. Rather than feed into the negativity, I decided to combat it because even though misery loves company, happiness is contagious! Now I make sure to reflect every year…

As I reminisce about 2018, I recognize that I am quite fortunate. 2018 was truly a marvellous year filled with love, happiness, and important moments and milestones. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for everything that I have experienced this year, and for all the people in my life whom I experienced it with. I won’t touch on everything, but here are some highlights:

Panama 2018

I had the opportunity to travel to Panama with 7 of my closest friends at the beginning of 2018, and it was really a trip of a lifetime! A week in the sun, poolside with some of your best friends was bliss. While in Panama we got to venture into Panama City and travel to a National Park Waterfall. Many laughs were had and the trip was a symbol of the bonds we have built over time, but also as a way to relax and unwind before the business of 2018 would kick into full gear; three of the people in this photo were getting married later on in the year.

Speaking of weddings, I had the utmost privilege to be the Matron of Honour and Best Woman in two of my friends’ weddings this year. Being chosen as the Matron of Honour in our friends’ wedding was extra special because my husband was asked to be the Best Man. For us, the love we have for the couple who got married is hard to summarize into words, thus being asked to be in their wedding was truly heartwarming. We wanted nothing but the best for those two, so we made it our mission to ensure their wedding day (and every event related to it) was everything they wanted and more. Planning a Tea-Party bridal shower was quite fun, especially because High Tea is something special the bride and I started doing together a few years ago. We added an extra dash of fun by making it a Mad Hatter Tea Party Theme…

Bridal Shower – April 2018

Spring 2018 also included road tripping to Myrtle Beach with some fabulous friends. We partook in some golf at Myrtlewood Golf Club, celebrated Cinco de Mayo at one of the best Mexican Restaurants, enjoyed the beach and pool (maybe a little too much), and experienced a very sweet Wine Tour! If you can think about the cliche phrase, “it’s the journey, not the destination” – that basically sums up the road trip to Myrtle Beach. Such an amazing time! I seriously recommend road trips at least once a year…

Golfing in Myrtle Beach

Celebrations in 2018 were not just about getting hitched, many of my friends also turned 30 this year. Birthdays have always been important to me, and I honestly believe that every birthday is worth celebrating because you never know what birthday might be your last. Sorry to be a downer here, but birthdays should be celebrated, whether that means treating yourself to something small or throwing a huge bash; whatever you wish! 2018 was filled with many fun-themed birthdays including Medieval Times, Old School Dances, Carnivals, and Road Trips to Ottawa!

  • Medieval Birthdays
  • 30th Birthday Dances
  • Life’s a Circus – Birthday Bash

Turning 30 was memorable for me because it gave me the chance to really appreciate everything that I have accomplished in my life so far. Apart from having an amazing husband, a wonderfully supportive family, and a supreme squad of friends, I am thankful for the continued opportunity to work with my family in Real Estate, while also being able to continue influencing young minds through my academic mentoring and tutoring. I’ve been working since I was 12, so knowing that I wake up every day and enjoy going to work is satisfying. I want my work to be meaningful and fulfilling but I don’t ever want it to make me miserable. Thus, I often reflect on how lucky I am to have work that is low-stress.

I will now touch upon the three weddings that I attended this year. As I mentioned above, I had the honour of being the Matron of Honour and Best Woman in two of the weddings, but the third wedding was also very important to me. Someone very special in my life was getting married, and he decided to do so on his birthday- what madness! It was an extra special day, and I was privileged to attend as a guest. I don’t know how to put into words how much I love all the people who got married in 2018, so I can only hope that they really do know how much I care for them. Being able to be with all of them on their wedding days and create new memories on is really priceless. Especially when you get to be in a room with so many people who love them too! I don’t think I ever danced or laughed or smiled as much as I did at these 2018 weddings…

  • July 21st, 2018
August 4th, 2018
  • September 29th, 2018

Overall, 2018 was a fantastic year. It was filled with laughter, love, adventure and memories. 2018 made some of my friends new parents, or parents again, and getting to witness these people take on these new roles is exciting. 2018 granted me the honour of being a 3x Auntie, as a new nephew was born into the family. 2018 reminded me why it is so important to be your truest self, to tell those who are important to you when they’ve upset, hurt or disappointed you, but to also tell those same people that you love them and why you do. 2018 taught me how adulting can really be fun, as my husband and I were able to do some additional renovations to our home, like completely finishing our basement!

2018 was a very good year, and I am glad that so many positive things happened in my life. Thanks for the memories! 2019, if you’re even half as good as 2018 was, I can’t wait to write about it.

The Internet Keeps Telling Me I Don’t Have Time for Friends After 30.

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Like me, you’ve probably scrolled past a meme or two highlighting the “sad” truths about becoming an adult. A lot of these posts seem to be mostly about two things: how our childhood punishments are now our adult goals or how as adults we don’t have time for anything, especially not friends or social life. Depending on the day, sometimes I’ll laugh and other times, I keep on scrolling.

Yesterday, I came across this one and it literally made me laugh-out-loud, but it wasn’t one of those “it’s funny ’cause it’s true” type of laughs and here’s why…

A very good friend of mine, one who has been in my life for over 12 years, is one of those friends who you can go from real talk to ridiculous all in the same sentence. Over the years we have talked about almost everything and anything under the sun. I am sure you’re reading this thinking, “okay, yeah we all have a friend or two like that.” And you’re not wrong. But, have you ever had an engaging and deep conversation about what friendship truly means? Can you define it? Can it be defined? What does it mean to really have a friendship with someone? I’m not trying to be philosophical here, I’m honestly asking you to think about it because I have. This friend I speak of, we’ve had this conversation, many, many times, and we continue to have this conversation again and again.

What’s crucial about these kinds of questions, and trying to define what friendship really means is how much the answers evolve. The answers aren’t universal either. What I need and how I manage or nourish one friendship doesn’t necessarily work for the others. Sure, the same basic foundations need to be there, but the level of attention, time, and communication differ. This isn’t always easy, but honestly, it’s also not that hard.

In the past I’ve had coworkers, even family members comment to me, “Wow, another (insert party/birthday/wedding/event)? You have too many friends.” Sometimes I’d laugh it off, but most of the time I’d reply, “Yeah. What a good problem to have!” No sarcasm. It is a good problem to have. I pride myself on the relationships and friendships I’ve built and maintained throughout my life. Yes, I’ve had many friends come and go, some of them for good, and some of them come back. I acknowledge that my personality can be polarizing at times, and I learned very early in life that not everyone is going to like me, and that is really okay. I also learned that you can grow out of friendships and that friendships can’t be forced. Please don’t ever force it, especially as an adult! We are all busy, and each of us has our own definition of what it means to be busy. None of us are really busier than the next person, because our perspectives and perceptions of what being “busy” means are personal.

I don’t expect my friends who just had a baby this year to have the same kind of “busy” schedule that I do or my friend who just got a promotion at his job in the city. I don’t have to worry about my relationship with these people because there is a mutual understanding of the kind of friendship we have together. Sure, we don’t see each other as often as we used to, but when we do, the conversation is meaningful and satisfying. The friendship is more than just reminiscing about old memories and stories, it’s also about sharing news and telling tales of current events that took place in our lives. Ultimately it’s about accepting and understanding that we are not the same people we were ________ years ago, nor should we be!

The point of this post wasn’t a humble brag about how great my friends and friendships are, and it wasn’t meant to make anyone reading this feel like having a lot of friends is important. What is important is having meaningful friendships. Meaningful friendships with your spouse, parents, siblings, roommates, classmates, coworkers, or whoever in your life is important to you. Also, understanding what makes that friendship meaningful to both of you. Quality over quantity!

Not that any of us should take the internet too seriously, but I am sure some of you read that meme above and the idea of entertaining or hanging out with 12 people at one time exhausted you. That’s okay. Reading that meme could have also delighted you. That’s okay too. Ultimately I hope what you take away from this post is this: friendship means different things to different people. 

Sorry internet, I do indeed have time for friends in my 30s. It’s a choice I make and one that is a priority to me. Priorities shift from time to time, and that’s okay because sooner or later they’ll shift again.

What traits in a friendship are important to you? If you want to chat about it, I’d be happy to listen and engage in conversation!

Wait, She’s Blogging?

manda_faromeiro

Yup. It’s happening! A blog.

Okay, it’s true. I’ve decided to start a blog. Really? I already said yes, and here’s why.

Since November 2016 I’ve had the pleasure of making the most out of the years and years of post-secondary education time (and money- so much money) studying to be an educator and became an academic tutor and mentor. After getting a job working in a school setting after graduating from Grad School in 2012, by 2016 I was feeling quite burnt out and ready to find a new career. This is not what I had in mind when I thought about working with children. Was everything I was taught in teachers college a facade? I wanted to be a teacher for as long as I can remember, honestly, since I was about 9 years old, so giving up on this dream was a hard pill to swallow. However, that is exactly what stress and unhappiness can do to your dreams. 

Quitting my job of almost five years was one of the hardest things I did; I had moved quickly up the company and for the most part, enjoyed the challenges and skills I was facing along the way. When I was recruited on LinkedIn for a Student Tutor/Mentor job, the light at the proverbial tunnel was once again in sight. After only working at this job for a few months in the evenings after my full-time work day was done, I knew I had found the honest reason why I had always been drawn to teaching from the beginning; making a difference. Yes, it’s cliche, but it’s true. My favourite part of being an educator is building relationships with my students, evoking their love of learning and trying new things, and helping them to learn new skills. In this job, I have had the pleasure of working closely with some very special students. Working with this group of students has reminded me how much I take for granted the ability I have to write. Which brings me to the reason for this blog.

One of my students used to hate writing. We have been working hard for the past year and a half on writing. Learning to write, like reading takes time, dedication, and practice. Practice is key. Session after session we would talk about writing tips, strategies, and we would practice writing. It did not matter how much or how little we wrote but each day we wrote. With each day that passed, we wrote a little more and a little more. Eventually, we got to a point where writing came easily to her. I did not have to prompt with questions or starting ideas, she came to our sessions with a little bit of writing done for each assignment that was given to her at school.

This week, I asked her, “How do you think you became so confident at writing?” She laughed and said, “Well, when you write every day you become more comfortable with it and you know how to get the ideas out of your head and onto the paper. Sometimes it doesn’t make sense, but at least I’ve written it down and can edit it later.”

As an educator, I jumped for joy. To see this kind of progress in over a year’s time is phenomenal. This student could barely get a sentence or two out without complaining or mumbling “I don’t know what to say” over and over again. Why is this important? It is another lesson when the student becomes the teacher. My student taught me to remember that wonderful feeling you get when you write.

As someone who loved school, yes, loved school, writing came very easy to me. I conducted research and wrote essays or reports with ease. In fact, my cognate in graduate school was originally 35 pages over the requirement. Nerd alert! So what does it mean? After my session with my students ended last night I had some time on the drive home to reflect on writing. I realized I don’t write much anymore, and I miss it. Sure, I won’t be writing any reports or research essays, but at least I’ll be writing.

That was long. If you’ve stuck through all that to get to this point, I thank you! Oh, and an official welcome to my blog! Not sure what exactly you’ll be reading about on here, but hey, as the saying goes, it’s the journey, not the destination that matters.

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

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