Tag: friendship

A 2010s Sendoff: Recapping the Last 10 Years (Part 4):

manda_faromeiro

2017
The beginning of 2017 started off in the most beautiful way; a dear friend of mine (whom I consider my un-biological little sister) was getting married! The whole day was lovely, and the spirit of joy, love and happiness kept us all warm throughout the -25 degree Celcius temperatures. I was honoured to be part of their special day and continue to have these people in my life! In January, I also started a second job, working as a mentor and tutor. I stepped out of my comfort zone this year and completed my first ever paint nite and got creative at Creative Cafe; before this time, I did not enjoy art and always felt I was very bad at it. This year, I also went ice skating for the first time in over 10 years for my brother’s birthday, and later would take up snowshoeing as well. It was shaping up to be a year of new adventures!

Early 2017 was also when I made the decision to quit my job. After more than 4 years, it was one of – if not the most- difficult decisions I have ever made for a number of reasons. For starters, I didn’t have a new full-time job lined up to replace it, so I felt a little unprepared and uneasy about not having the same income flow coming in. Additionally, I had invested so much time and energy into the company, it felt like a breakup. What was the most important note here was the overall feeling I had about work; I always pride myself on working hard and learning new skills etc., and while my career or job didn’t necessarily define me, it was crucial for me that it always be something I enjoyed and felt benefited me not just financially. My job was not only feeling stagnant, but I was also feeling run down and was dreading coming into work every day. I never had anything positive to say about my workday, and I was feeling incredibly stuck. I knew this wasn’t healthy and it wasn’t going to get any better, so I had to remove myself from the situation. I was sad, relieved, excited, nervous, and optimistic all at once. As soon as I spoke to my boss and explained everything about how I was feeling and why I was leaving, I felt an immense weight lifted off my shoulders, so while there was still a few unknowns about what was next for my career, I was surprisingly okay with letting things shape themselves out.

One of the big highlights of 2017 was celebrating 30th birthdays for some very important people; first up was an incredible weekend in Ottawa filled with wine tastings and hockey! Too many laughs, too many jokes, too much 80s music and too much wine! It was truly one of the most fun weekends ever, and I know that the birthday man enjoyed himself to the fullest. A few weeks later, I surprised my best friend with a trip to Las Vegas to watch the Backstreet Boys Larger Than Life concert. The timing was perfect not only for us to get a trip in as best friends, but with having such a great kick-off to new beginnings with work. While we were only in Vegas for a few days, we jampacked those days will lots of site seeing, selfies, walking the strip, lounging at the pool, and ending off with the phenomenal BSB concert. Celebrating her 29th birthday in Vegas was surely a top 5 moment for the decade!

Spring 2017 graced me with the opportunity to begin working with family, as I started my job as an Executive Assistant for my brother and sister-in-law’s real estate business. While I was no stranger to working with family, I was intrigued to learn more about the world of real estate and gain new skills while sharpening those I had been working on with each new job title. A year in the 2010s wouldn’t be the same without another concert thrown in the mix, a few more paint nites, boardgame nights, exploring provincial parks, cottage weekends, and road trips. This year, I celebrated my birthday with a few close friends in Niagara Falls where we did a day-long wine tour visiting five different wineries. With a load of great experiences encompassing the first half of the year, Summer 2017 was shaping up to be nothing short of amazing!

Summer brought about cherry-picking trips, WWE live events, high-tea afternoons, more birthday celebrations for friends and close family, engagements, my first ever Vegan Fest, the CNE, a few more Blue Jays games, and to no one’s surprise, a treetop trek or two! Additionally, I got to experience yet another incredible Coldplay concert in Toronto. It was this year that I was asked to be part of two incredible weddings for the upcoming year as a Matron of Honour and the Best Woman, but more on that in 2018s post!

My best friend and I also ventured off to Chicago this summer to watch the Blue Jays on the road and check out the city! We saw the “bean” while walking around downtown Chicago, rode the sky wheel, ate a lot of deep-dish pizza, sat on a boat tour, and learned so much about the city’s skyscrapers and architecture. Chicago was an amazing city that offered so many perfect little shops and delectable snacks, definitely, a highlight was the popcorn shop and the little cupcake storefront. I am so thankful for another amazing road trip with my bestie.

Autumn brought another successful Client Appreciation Party for the Lucia Faria Real Estate Team, another Jays game or two, and a lovely girl’s weekend away in Blue Mountain. Of course, we continued to celebrate Halloween with our annual bash, followed by a wine tasting night-in, and a few attempts at karaoke and rockband – I didn’t say they were successful ones, but they sure were a hell-of-a-lot-of fun! A few more birthday celebrations were thrown into the mix, including some kids, as well as more creative afternoons at the cafe, and yes, a lovely tea-time double date as the year came to a close. Oh, and yes, another Star Wars movie in December – Star Wars VII: The Last Jedi. We hosted a family Christmas as well as another wonderful Friendship Christmas and said goodbye to 2017 and hello 2018 at the 80s themed New Year’s Eve party! No further commentary necessary, 2017 was superb!

2018
Before I even dive into the goodness that was all of 2018, I just have to mention how overcome with gratitude and joy I am as I look back at all the marvellous and incredible experiences and events that have taken place this decade. So many times we often think about our life as being busy and chaotic, it can take a while before we see that in the midst of all that, there are so many phenomenal things happening. While I’ve been sitting here writing this 2010s sendoff I am truly blessed. I value all of my experiences throughout the years and appreciate how I have been able to keep balance in my life. I am thankful that those relationships I’ve worked so hard to maintain are still intact, and hope that those who have come into my life recently can be met with the same fate for the next decade and beyond. Now let’s jump right into 2018 because baby, it’s a thrill ride.

The earliest days of 2018 consisted of birthday celebrations for family members and friends alike, royal celebrations, and classy high tea afternoons. There were wedding plans in the works and without doubt, a permanent glow in our hearts for all the love and happy times ahead for the next twelve months.

This year, I got to experience what some may argue was more than 10 years in the making, and that was a friends’ group vacation. At the end of January, a group of 8 of us jetted off to Panama for a week of fun in the sun. Without a doubt, this trip was an iconic milestone not only for the decade but for our timeline of friendship. Most of us on the trip had been friends for more than 10 years already and had never experienced a shared moment like this before. The trip started out as a way for us to celebrate the soon to be bride and groom in lieu of bachelor and bachelorette parties but soon became so much more. Coordinating the schedules of 8 people can be difficult, but we made it work and were able to have arguably one of the best weeks ever in hot, beautiful, Panama. Apart from everyday pleasures like lounging poolside, we partook in tours of Panama City (old and new), got to see the Panama Canal, visited a natural waterfall, played far too much BINGO, and consumed copious amounts of delicious food and thirst-quenching beverages; jungle juice anyone?

After Panama, it was full-on wedding planning mode as I assisted the soon-to-be-married couples with tasks like dress and suit shopping, mailing out invitations, and other wedding details. In early 2018, a few friends were celebrating the milestone 30th birthday; from dance parties to medieval times, there was so much to celebrate! Spring meant it was time to practice that golf swing and discuss the upcoming nuptials over some tea or wine. There was also a surprise Mad Hatter Tea Party Bridal shower thrown into the mix!

Next to Panama, another milestone vacation happened in May as we piled into a Jeep Cherokee and began an epic road trip to Myrtle Beach. Like Panama, this trip was long overdue as the three of us had been friends since 2007 and our trio, forever coined as Hydra, had never experienced a getaway together. With 1/3 of Hydra marrying that fall, it was a celebration of many things, but most importantly, friendship. Through all the hills and valleys, BNL and Billy Joel’s greatest hits albums, and 80s music alike on repeat, we had a super fun journey that week. Apart from late afternoons at the beach, we played a round or two of golf (both actual and mini), took in a wine tour, visited the pier and sky wheel, and truly indulged in some phenomenal food. On a side note, we also partook in a heartbreaking playoff loss by the Toronto Raptors, but watching the game on Cinco de Mayo was memorable for sure. That trip created so many memories that we all will hold onto for years to come, most definitely!

Upon returning home from Myrtle, I kicked off Summer with another great concert as well as going to see the theatrical production of Chicago. In June, I turned 30 and since celebrating my birthday is always special to me, it was no surprise that a milestone like 30 would be any different. I was blessed with being able to throw a carnival themed party with all my friends and family present. Life’s a Circus was such a fitting theme for everything that happened to me in my 20s but in the best way. I’m always looking for fun, adventure, good eats and games, so I couldn’t have selected a better theme to sum up my life!

Before long, it was July and prior to the wedding of our Best Couple Friends Ever, there was another birthday or two to celebrate, as well as a baby shower for dear friends of ours who were expecting their first child later on in the year. As I’ve explained in other blog posts, this year was a very special one when it came to weddings. July was the first of three weddings to which I would have the honour in attending; two of which I was blessed to be part of the wedding party and partake in all the behind-the-scenes moments of love and joy as the couples became wed. Our friends Mark and Lyndsay were married on the 21st of July and my husband and I were the Best Man and Matron of Honour. The love we have for those two people cannot be put into words, and that was truly one of the best days of my life as we got to celebrate them in such a wonderful way. You could not ask for two better souls and humans to end up together, and for such an amazing tightly bonded group of friends to celebrate their love as a couple.

There was a two-week break before the next wedding, and it included another birthday celebration as well as a trip to Ottawa where we got to do an escape room in the Difenbunker Museum and visit some iconic landmarks within the city. On August 4th, we celebrated the wedding day of another one of my best friends, on what was another beautiful day and cherished moment. Again, it was a day filled with joy, love and happiness as my best friend wed his beautiful bride. Closing out the summer with a Blue Jays game and a girls’ day at the beach, as well as some family BBQs, it was time to prepare for the closing quarter of 2018.

In September, my husband and I became a 3x Aunt and Uncle as our nephew Oscar was born. With the last preparations for the Annual Client Appreciation Party completed for work, I was able to focus all of my attention on my upcoming Best Woman duties, as the last of the 2018 weddings would soon be taking place. It was time to revisit North Bay for what would be the best reason, as our friends were going to get married! If you’ve been following my blog, you know there was a special post dedicated to this wedding and the importance it held to me as a milestone mark in the friendship I have with the groom. Apart from North Bay being nostalgic for so many reasons, a new mark was about to be left on the city and in our hearts forever. There were so many iconic places to fit in our schedule with so little time, but we did what we could: a hike to the falls, a meal or two at Burger World, a campus tour, and one last Thursday evening at Cecil’s. With the last of the wedding details out of the way and the rehearsal dinner over, we spent late Friday night doing what we do best; sharing stories, hopes, laughs, filming vlogs that are way too long for anyone else’s interest, and celebrating the groom. The day of the wedding was a great one, with the highlight being the time we got to spend getting the groom ready and just being our trio in the simplest and best way possible; and the rest of the day was filled with just as many laughs and filled with just as much love!

With four very important people in my life now all married, how was the rest of 2018 going to shape up? Autumn traditions continued, like the Lucia Faria Team Client Appreciation Party, our Annual Halloween bash, and exploring more beautiful parks. There was also a bridal shower for a dear friend who would get married at the beginning of 2019, as well as more great birthdays for our nephews! We would once again host our family for Christmas, and continue the tradition of Friendship Christmas for the 4th year in a row. 2018 was filled with immense amounts of love, joy and celebrations. It was a year that planted deeper roots in existing relationships and deepened my understanding of my place in the hearts of those whom I care for deeply. With so many people in my life going through milestones of their own, 2018 was a year of profound growth and emotion. While it was surely one of the best years of the decade, 2018 was quite emotional for me, but in an overall positive way. I was truly invested in the happiness and love of others more so than ever before, and it was quite exhilarating.

2019
This is it! The last year of the decade. It’s funny how at the beginning of the year, I wasn’t at all emphasizing the fact that this would be the last year of an iconic decade. So much happened between 2010 to 2019 that it was baffling to think that if any year was going to truly send off the decade, that 2019 would be it. If writing this 2010s sendoff has shown me anything, its the truth in the notion that it is the little moments that make life amazing. My 2010s look so different in the eyes of others, and while I may have looked back on a year at its end and thought “damn, I’m glad that’s over” I can truly say that no year was simply 365 days of limbo before getting to a “better” path or part of my life. Each and every experience shaped me in a different way, and without sounding super cliche, they were all necessary and as unfortunate as some events may be, they were bound to happen eventually. Without further ado, let’s recap 2019.

In January, I got to celebrate the winter wedding of a long-time friend, and truly it was a beautiful day filled with excitement and joy. Weeks before her wedding, we attended a classy bachelorette party in her honour and also celebrated a few friends’ birthdays. After a busy 2018 year of weddings, it was still an honour to have a small part in her special day by reading at her mass. The whole day was loads of fun and a great celebration all around. A few days later, my bestie and I would be southbound once again for another incredible Disney World vacation! For the first time, we would be staying on Disney property at Coronado Springs. I won’t go into much detail about this trip because I actually blogged about each day in their own separate posts, so look for that on my homepage! To sum it up, it was magical and wonderful, despite the temperature dropping and me coming down with a brutal sinus infection by the end of the trip. Regardless, it was a great way to kick off 2019.

My husband and I took a couples spa day at Scandinavian Spa in Collingwood, and I enjoyed my first ever relaxation massage. There were more birthday celebrations, board game afternoons and evenings, as well as more creative afternoons at the cafe. 2019 was surely the year of golf, as I hit the links numerous times with my friend KJ, with a few pars here and there to celebrate! Avengers Assembled for the End Game, and some of us mourned the death of Thanos while others applauded. There were also some housewarming get-togethers as well as a girls’ day at the spa. My nephew had his First Communion and the Raptors were making history with a clinch of the East and were in the NBA finals. If it feels like I am lacking some details with some of these events it’s only because I have blogged a few of these moments in further details in previous entries, so look back if you’re interested…

To celebrate turning 31, I played laser tag with some friends and enjoyed a great meal, and I also went treetop trekking with my best friend and had dinner with my family! Days later, the Toronto Raptors would become NBA champions and I cried so much that day, you’d have thought that I was an NBA champion. Summer 2019 brought on more epic films, as Toy Story 4 hit theatres. I continued to work on my golf swing, with many awesome days out on the green and took time to slow down and enjoy the little things like beach days with friends. Summer also brought about another career change as I quit my tutoring and mentoring job and would soon get the opportunity to start a career with Georgian College. It wouldn’t really be summer without a road trip or two, as well as some exploring of our provincial parks. My best friend got her first apartment, and we were able to help her move in, and later celebrate with a little apartment warming party. The first half of the year brought upon a lot of greatness, yet with calmness because time didn’t feel like it was flying by and this was a nice feeling.

Autumn brought us another fantastic Client Appreciation Party for the Lucia Faria Real Estate Team, as well as a lovely ladies’ weekend at the spa in Collingwood. Our fifth Annual Halloween Party was a blast, as usual, and I got to visit North Bay again to take in some Grand Slam Curling with a good friend. The year was winding down, but there was still fun to be had. A few more birthday celebrations thrown into the mix, more board game nights, as well as revisiting some escape room adventures. In November, my husband and I were hit by a car one evening by someone who failed to come to a stop at the stop sign. While our car was written off, we walked away from the incident with minor injuries, but I would spend the remaining months of 2019 in physiotherapy with a hairline fracture in my tailbone and a torn muscle in my neck and shoulder area. All things considered, we were very lucky, but would begin shopping for a new vehicle once we felt up to it. In the meantime, I was really enjoying my time at Georgian and continued to split my days between the campus, the Lucia Faria Team, and my SweetLegs side business.

Here we are, at the end of 2019 and what a decade it has been. Our nephews turned 8 years old, Hobbes turned 4, and we bought a brand new vehicle. The last of the Star Wars movies came out this year, Star Wars IX: The Rise of Skywalker, and I partook in a Dr. Seuss experience in the city. Another wonderful Friendship Christmas took place, and the last day of the decade is here! It’s fitting that I write the last few sentences of this blog as there are mere hours remaining of such an incredibly memorable decade. I’ve never been the type to make resolutions, but my wish for 2020 and the decade ahead is that it is full of lessons, experiences and adventures that are both new and old so that I can continue to value them and the people involved. As 2020 approaches, my husband and I celebrate not only 5 years married, but also 15 years of togetherness. Through all of these moments mentioned in this blog, I have been truly blessed to share them all with him and knowing that he will always be there alongside me. And lastly, thank you to everyone reading this blog, but also to all those who have been part of my life this decade, and beyond. My heart is full, as is my head with beautiful, wonderful, magical, inspiring, amazing memories, moments and milestones. See you on, the other side!

A 2010s Sendoff: Recapping the Last 10 Years (Part 3):

manda_faromeiro

2015
I’m biased when I say that this was the best year of the decade, but that’s truly how I feel. This year was jam-packed with fun, adventures, celebrations, love and pure epicness. 2015 began with a few more snowboarding sessions, gameboard days turning into nights, and many things wedding- like saying “yes to the dress” after only trying on a few! March Madness included celebrating group birthdays, finding bridesmaids’ dresses, catching a concert or two and some Raptors’ games (we even got to meet Damon Stoudamire). Time was flying by, but it’s no surprise with so many wonderful events happening, and the biggest party of the summer was going to go down in a few short months.

In Spring, there was an epic paintball adventure for a good friend’s bachelorette party, followed by a menu tasting for my wedding with family, a getaway to Port Carling to visit our best friends, more attempts at golf, another concert (or two), and suit shopping with the groomsmen for our wedding. It wouldn’t be the 2010s without a few more Blue Jays games, and wedding season was officially on with my cousin’s wedding in June. June also meant another wonderful birthday celebration, as well as my brother’s graduation, exploring new provincial parks, and a dress fitting or two.

One month to go before our wedding, July began with the most amazing bachelorette weekend ever; I truly could not have asked for or planned a weekend that was so much fun. I headed to Niagara Falls with some of my favourite gal pals for three days of laughs, love and adventure. My BFF and my MOH (Maid of Honour) planned a night of interactive party games, followed up a full day of an Amazing Race style scavenger hunt that had two teams racing all up, down and around Niagara Falls, and closing it out with a superb dinner and night of dancing! Anyone who knows me, knows that I am near impossible to surprise, and being such a planner, to have someone take over all control of planning my bachelorette party was difficult for me, but she truly hit a grand slam home-run with that weekend! Truly one of the best weekends of my life. Believe it or not, I was totally brought to tears that weekend, not only because I was given a special keepsake scrapbook with messages and photos from all my gal pals, but in all reality, growing up with so many guy friends, I never thought that I would have so many amazing ladies in my life to call my good friends and celebrate my bachelorette with me; oh and facetiming my cousin/bridesmaid in Newfoundland in the weekend also made me cry; another rare sight.

It was finally August which means we were days away from our wedding. Most of the days leading up to the wedding were pretty standard stuff: pick up the dress, pick up the suits, drop off the centerpieces to the flourist, get the rehearsal done, then contain your excitement for the biggest party of the summer! My husband and I are truly blessed because no two people could have felt more love on our wedding day than the two of us; its cliche but it’s true. Being together for almost 10 years by our wedding, everyone had built-up excitement and enthusiasm for our big day. With all the “you’re finally getting married” lines out of the way, our wedding was also a great opportunity for my family to get together and celebrate something wonderful; for the first time in years both my mom’s and dad’s sides of the family were under the same roof, laughing, smiling and catching up. Walking into the hall, you could feel all the joy, love, and positive emotions in the room, and it’s a feeling I will never forget. August 15th 2015 was a scorcher day, weather wise, so thank goodness for an indoor wedding venue and an open-bar! We celebrated our wedding day with about 175 friends and family, ate way too much delicious food, and drank all the thirst quenching beverages in sight! When the clock struck midnight we ate a little more and continued to dance the late night away. The next day, we travelled to Great Wolf Lodge in Niagara Falls for a little post-wedding getaway with our wedding party; our best and closest friends supported us so much through our entire relationship and the wedding planning process we wanted to thank them but also celebrate an extra special way with them for getting us married. Incase you couldn’t tell, we’re big kids at heart so waterslides and hanging out playing games is an ideal weekend for us; we had an absolute blast!

In Fall 2015 there was no slowing down, as two of our dear friends would also be tying the knot; one in September and another in October. There was also another successful Client Appreciation Party thrown by my brother and sister-in-law for their real estate business clients; which started in 2013 and was growing in numbers each year. Round out October with another concert, and what would become an annual tradition Halloween bash at our house! November brought upon a new apartment warming party for our friends, and yes, another road trip to Ottawa where we’d discover a hidden gem winery and the epic Diefenbunker museum. We cannot forget those epic board game nights too.

Just when you thought 2015 couldn’t possibly fit any more epicness into it, Star Wars was back in theatres for the first time in 10 years! Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens was released and really, the force awoke in almost everyone; what an exciting time! We closed out the year with what would become another annual tradition: Friendship Christmas. With the decade half over, it was difficult to picture what other events might occur that would be as life changing as the last few years. 2015 was one of the happiest years of my life, so 2016 had some pretty big shoes to fill. It was unlikely that it would match that bar but it came pretty close.

2016
Most of 2016 started off with the same likeness as 2015; much snowboarding and game nights and new experiences like escape rooms! In February, Jeff and I would visit Ochi Rios, Jamaica for our honeymoon in what would be the most pampered and relaxing experience of my life; I am forever thankful for how astounding that vacation was! A honeymoon really is a once in a lifetime experience, and having a private pool, butler service and such amazing food and drink at our fingertips was overwhelming, but in a good way! In addition to relaxing poolside and at the beach, we were able to visit Dunns River for the day. Our honeymoon was wonderful because we got to spend time away from everyday life and we got to do it together; a nice reminder to slow down and take in the little moments. Taking our honeymoon 6 months after our actual wedding was also a great refresher of those exciting feels you get on your wedding day!

After our honeymoon, Jeff and I visited the humane society and picked out a new furry friend to bring home. Initially we were told this adorable little white and grey kitty was a girl, so we named her Zelda; my husband is a huge Legend of Zelda fan. A week later when we took Zelda to the vet, we found out that Zelda was actually a boy. For a day or two, The Cat Formally Known as Zelda had no new name, but eventually we decided on Hobbes; like the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes. I was so overjoyed to have a cat back in my life, and to this day we love and adore Hobbes dearly.

Spring 2016 brought on live wrestling events, another concert or two, some treetop trekking, another Raptors playoff run, more exploring of our provincial parks, a friend’s baby shower, and an epic archery tag birthday party for yours truly! I was also asked to be a bridesmaid in my dear friends wedding, which was going to be in January 2017, so there were a handful of bridal preparations throughout this year that I was helping the bride-to-be get checked off her list. A few days after my birthday, my best friend and I took a road trip to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania to catch the Blue Jays on the road, but also partake in some American history. I love road trips because they bring out some of the best conversations, carpool karaoke sessions, and just an overall grand adventure you’ll remember for a lifetime. Being history majors, we adored how rich in history Philadelphia was from the liberty bell, to Independence Hall, and the National Constitution Centre, and Eastern State Penitentiary, much fun was had! Yes, we climbed those famous Rocky-steps up the museum, and of course we indulged in some Philly Cheesesteak! The Jays games were blast; ballpark food is out of this world in the States, and we may have fallen in love with the Phillie Phanatic. If you’ve never been to Philadelphia, I highly recommend it!

Summer kicked off with my brother’s wedding, a cottage bachelorette weekend for my dear friend, more outdoor adventures at some provincial parks, continued treetop trekking adventures, friends’ having babies, another round of Rogers’ Cup tennis, and cottage weekends. For the first time in forever, we got to spend the long-weekend away at the cottage with friends, and oh what laughs were had! Truly a great little getaway with some really amazing people. A cousin’s wedding would close out the summer, as would some natural rock climbing adventures; note to anyone wanting to try this- it’s quite an experience but it definitely takes a toll on your body- especially if you do not exercise or climb regularly; worth a try though if you love outdoor adventures.

Before I go on any further about the wonderful things that continued to happen in 2016, I would like to take a moment and touch upon the other things going on in my life at this time. Having been at my job for about four years now, I had taken on much more responsibility with every passing school year and it was beginning to take its toll on me. Long work days followed by after hours phone calls from staff, coupled with continuous lack of staff to cover programs had me stretched out pretty thin attempting to do my job in addition to that of the front-line staff who were either ill, needed time off or were practically non-existent. I enjoy being challenged in the workplace and I face new responsibilities with a positive attitude, but day in and day out of the same constant problems with no support from head office to help our small team was equal parts physically and emotionally draining. While I adored my supervisors very much, we were all under a great deal of stress trying to juggle all the roles, paperwork, staff and parents that were knocking at our door each day. The circumstances of my career took a toll on me because I didn’t want to walk away from a challenge and I was learning so much valuable experience and skill set that could never be taught in a classroom. More importantly, I wasn’t sure where I would go next if I left the company; although I was a teacher by trade, I was certain that going back on the supply list or being in the classroom wasn’t exactly what I wanted. I took much of 2016 as a chance to think more clearly about what would be next for me as a career, but more on that later!

September 2016 was another magical time because I would return to Walt Disney World with my best friend and a good friend of ours from Nipissing who moved overseas would be joining us! We ventured to Epcot for the Food and Wine Festival, indulging in delicious food from all over the world throughout the World Showcase exhibit. We met a ton of characters in Magic Kingdom, took a Jungle Cruise, ate lunch with the friends from the Hundred Acre Woods, and visited Animal Kingdom for the first time! The highlight of our trip was Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween Party, which was an after-dark event at Magic Kingdom where all guests could dress up and go trick-or-treating throughout the park, meet villains and ride some attractions! We dressed up as the Aliens from Toy Story; so many people loved our costumes, especially Buzz Lightyear. Such a magnificent vacation it was, especially because it would be the last time I would see my friend from overseas for a long time!

The closing months of 2016 included our second annual Halloween Party, a few more board game nights, escape rooms, and more frequent hockey games where my nephew was the star player! A wine and cheese night was thrown into the mix, as was a bridal shower/fiesta for the January bride-to-be, another road trip to Ottawa, and yes- another Star Wars story (Rogue One). Last but not least, a lovely Friendship Christmas was had, followed by a pajama party New Years Eve. 2016 had some big shoes to fill, and all things considered, it didn’t disappoint. The year continued to strengthen many bonds made years prior, while introducing some new people into my life as well. Friends of mine were starting or growing their families, and changes were brewing! With my dear friends wedding mere days away, I was excited for all that 2017 would bring even if it was a tad scary! Stay tuned…

How I Came Around to Enjoying Golf

manda_faromeiro

If you would have asked me 5 years ago if I ever envisioned myself being someone who enjoys playing golf, so much so that I would actually miss playing it during the winter months, it would have been a solid “no” followed by a chuckle or two. It’s crazy to think back, even that short time ago, and recognize how disinterested I was in playing golf; I had no real desire to get out there and felt it was far too boring. To be fair, apart from mini golfing, my experience and exposure to playing golf was very limited; no one in my household played golf, and neither did anyone in my extended family or even my friends. In school, while I was exposed to many different kinds of sports, golf was not one of them. Thus, many of my years were spent not even considering it as a hobby or pastime, there were plenty of other sports and things to occupy my time, so I didn’t give it much thought… until recently.

A few years ago, our good friends were living up in Port Carling for work (they were chefs working at one of the main resorts) and whenever we could, we tried to go up and visit them for a weekend. On one of these weekends, we decided to go to one of the small 9-hole golf courses up there; something to do for an afternoon and we figured we could entertain ourselves with how potentially bad our game would be. At the time, I knew very little about golf. The basics of the game and scoring I understood, but as far as what clubs to use or how to properly swing were totally unknown to me. In my mind, we were going golfing just for fun; this course was very inexpensive, so it’s not like this round of fun was costing us $50+ dollars or anything. As the day progressed, I was pretty much as bad as I expected to be, with the odds not in my favour, though I did manage to score a par, but overall I wasn’t going to be picking up the clubs again anytime soon. I don’t remember what my score was, but that was probably for the best. Nevertheless it was a fun afternoon hanging out with friends and getting to be outside for the day. After this, returning to the golf course didn’t cross my mind and it would be a number of years before I ever set foot on a course again…

Golfing in Port Carling 2014

In 2018, one of my very good friends was getting married, and if you’ve been following my previous posts you already know that I was the Best Woman in his wedding. To celebrate, myself and the other Best Woman took our friend to Myrtle Beach for a week; call it a bachelor week celebration but really and truly it was a perfect excuse for us to celebrate over a decade of friendship and go on a road trip. The groom being a golfer, we knew that hitting up a golf course in Myrtle Beach was a definite must-do for the trip. So that’s just what we did. Through researching the kinds of courses Myrtle Beach had to offer, we knew this wasn’t an experience we could simply wing, we needed to arrive to the course looking the part as if we had all been avid golfers for years (or at least trying). I took this task very seriously. I didn’t want to show up to such a fancy golf course and goof around. Of course, having fun was still the main goal, but if I was going to be golfing at a place like Myrtlewood Golf Club, I had to prepare. Not to mention, the groom really enjoyed golfing, so we owed it to him to be in the zone and willing to make the most of those 18 holes.

Months before the trip, I did my homework. I started to learn more about the game and I picked the brain of the groom to ask about his own experiences with golf. I kept an eye on a few shops to see if a good bargain for a set of golf clubs would ever come up, and had my friend looking out as well. I went to a driving range or two, trying whole-heartedly to give myself a better shot at performing well this time around. If I could score a par by fluke the last time, who knows what I was capable of doing on a 18-hole course with some legitimate practice. I knew that we were going to have fun regardless of the score, but I changed my mindset on the whole golf experience; I really wanted to focus on the skills and not just wack a ball around for several hours. Not to mention, I didn’t want my friend to be golfing with two people who were out there taking 8 to 10 strokes per hole; ain’t nobody got time for that!

Driving Range Practice Spring 2018

A few days before we left for Myrtle Beach I was able to find a great starter set of clubs, and loaded up on balls and tees and some other golfing accessories. Before long, days into our trip had passed and it was finally golfing day. All of us were excited! The sun was shining, and we had such a stellar week so far, the golf was going to be another great highlight to add to the reel. With the guidance of my friend, coupled with my own intentions of tuning out any negative thoughts, being mindful of my swings, and focusing my attention on the ball, most of the holes were met with success. Don’t get me wrong, a few of the holes absolutely destroyed any confidence I thought I had about my game improving, I mean 13 strokes on hole 4 is pretty devastating. How does one come back from that? A par on hole 6 should do it! Despite what some may think, getting that par on hole 6 was such an electrifying feeling. Golfing on such a legitimate course, and coming back strong with a par after that horrendous 13-stroke hole 4, was incredible! The day was still early, but it was just the boost of confidence I needed for the remaining holes. Looking back on that game, there were definite lows and highs. Knowing what I know now (which still isn’t a great deal) I recognize where my shots got sloppy (probably due to fatigue) or where I didn’t think ahead of where exactly I wanted the ball to end up. The scorecard was pretty up and down; I did manage to get a few bogeys, but I also managed to get a few more 10 or 11 stroke holes *facepalm*. Overall, that 6 hour day of golf was exhausting. More notably, it left me thinking more about the game more than I ever had before. Now I was interested in getting out there again, and maybe getting another par or two!

  • Celebrating a Par on Hole 6
  • Myrtlewood Golf Club – May 2018

During the trip to Myrtle, the three of us did a lot of vlogging, and when we got home and watched some of the footage from the trip, I was thankful that we captured some of the golfing trip so that I could really relive the fun and excitement. Each time I thought about that day on the course, I kept thinking over what I would do differently next time, and assessing where and how I could improve. Before long, I recognized that golf was going to be something that I really enjoyed and wanted to keep playing. Something about being outdoors, challenging yourself and your own skill, as well as the peacefulness of having nothing to worry about but getting that ball on the green was very satisfying. These days, it is so easy to get caught up in all the distractions around us, but when I was golfing, that was all I was thinking about. Going on the golf course allowed me to shut-out everything else going on and just sharpen my skill by defining my thoughts on my own game. Golfing allowed me to be really present in the moment, and to take my time; something that is really taken for granted. Not to mention, being on the golf course was a really great opportunity to have quality time with someone; being outside in a quiet setting has that sort of effect.

Nottawasaga Golf Course, Alliston Ontario

Coming around to golf and thoroughly enjoying it wasn’t years in the making. It’s safe to say that one experience completely changed my perspective. Despite having really crummy holes in some of the rounds, I continued to focus on getting better; hitting further, making better contact, having the ball travel straighter to where I needed it to go, and yeah, getting another par or two each round. Perhaps one day, even a birdie! As I said, it wasn’t long before I was back on the course. There were still crummy holes played, but there were many more improvements! I have my friend to thank for a lot of my progress, merely because he was very patient with me but also helped to pinpoint what little adjustments I needed to make to get better. When I would go to him for feedback, he helped me to recognize where I was right, and how I could move forward with my own critiques to ensure that I would get into the swing of things in no time.

  • Playing at Nottawasaga Resort Golf Course
  • Continuing the Par Streak at Innisbrook Golf Club

So there you have it, a quick history on how I came around to enjoying golf. When I sit down to write these kinds of blogs, it always reminds me of how important it is to not only give things a chance, but how crucial it is to have the right kind of mindset, attitude, and presence while you’re doing these things. Don’t get me wrong, there was absolutely nothing discouraging about my friends the first time I went golf back in 2014, as those people are some of the best people to be around. I believe it is just about timing. There is a time and place for everything, and sometimes it takes some aged wisdom coupled with the growing need for one to unplug for an afternoon and just enjoy the great outdoors with some great company, playing a game that can be so great, and so greatly frustrating.

Engaging Next Level Friendship

manda_faromeiro

We’ve all experienced it, often without realizing. That pivotal, official moment when we realize that we have found a friend for keeps. Friendship is such a fascinating concept. Some people use the word “friend” more loosely than others. What does it mean to call someone a friend? Is it just someone you see at group get-togethers? Is it someone you call, text or keep in contact with often?

I have always believed in different levels and tiers of friendship. Sure, I have those people in my life that I only see a few times a year or those people whom I only hang out within a group setting, but I seldom call these people my friends. I have had the unfortunate experience, like I am sure everyone has at least once in their life, of believing that some people were my friends, and they turned out not to be for many reasons. I learned early on that you won’t always get the same effort, love, or attention that you give. We aren’t meant to be best friends or even good friends with everyone in our life. In fact, different relationships serve different purposes. Not every friend is going to be that go-to person we tell everything to, or that we know we can always have fun with regardless of what we are (or are not) doing. There are those friends that we are only going to see at group gatherings because that’s the only time that they show up, or they live far away and it’s hard to find time to hang out. Sometimes, and perhaps more often than we realize, our friendships are not equal. Friendships are not 50/50, nor can they be. We all need different things from our social interactions, engagements and our friendships. When I said above that I learned the hard way about believing people were my friends, when it turned out they weren’t, I wasn’t referring to something they might have done once that was unforgivable to me, I am talking about those friends that you really invest in emotionally, give your time to, are there for them when they are really down and out, and they repay you with unanswered calls, text messages, and never having any time for you. About 5 years ago, I really started eliminating these people from my life, and it was a really great feeling. I spent more time investing in those who were around often, checked up on me often, and really listened when I had something to say. I started thinking more deeply and paying attention to the little things they had done and realized that there was always one event, one act, one moment when that person really proved they care for you a lot; next level friendship mode was engaged…

Now, the real reason I got inspired for this blog post was that I was thinking about a friend of mine who has a birthday coming up soon. I have known this person for a long time and considered myself to be friends with him for many years (since the end of high school in fact, which was 2005/2006). We hung out frequently, had good conversations and laughs, and yes, I really became friends with him first off because he was best friends with my boyfriend (now husband) but I enjoyed his company, always. While we seemed to mostly hang out together in small or large groups, I never doubted that he was my friend. As I said, we had good conversations, had things in common, and it was never dull or awkward to hang out. We did have deep conversations with meaning and our friendship was evolving with time, as all friendships should. Our relationship was great. So when did I know for sure that he was truly a friend for keeps? After all, it’s not like he was going anywhere, he and my husband had been best friends since elementary school, so he was going to be in my life forever.

In 2018 this friend was getting married, and as mentioned in other posts, my husband was the Best Man and I was the Matron of Honour. When we were first asked to be in their wedding party, we accepted with joy, honour, excitement, pride and without any hesitation. When it came time for us to sit down and write out our speech for the wedding night, I had the chance to reflect on my relationship with both the bride and groom as separate individuals. As we sat and talked over the kinds of moments we would touch upon in our speech it became very evident to me, almost as though I was hit in the face with a brogue kick (wrestling reference). I knew that the groom was truly a friend for keeps because of an event that took place in the summer of 2011.

In June of 2011, I graduated from university for the first time. I completed my honours degree and my teaching degree but would embark on a new educational adventure in September when I was beginning my graduate program at Queens. Of course, there was much prep involved before starting school in a new city and it was a process. Being an organized person helped to keep me sane and made things a lot easier. There was an opportunity for me to retrieve my keys for my new apartment a month earlier than I was scheduled to move in, and being that I was working almost every day of the summer to save up for school, I had to take the first day off I could to try and get as many things moved up there as possible. It was very last minute and honestly, I wasn’t expecting anyone to be able to drop everything and help me so last minute; I just assumed I was going to take a carload of things to my new apartment all by myself and that was okay.

A few days before I was going to leave, this friend had texted us to see when we were free to hang out next. I expressed that I only had one day off and that I was going to be gone all day that day because I was moving up some stuff to Kingston. Without hesitation, my friend asked if I wanted some help or needed the company for the drive. I explained that I would be gone all day long so I wouldn’t want to take his whole day, as I didn’t have a planned end time to be home. He insisted on coming to help, and said he didn’t care how many pieces of Ikea furniture he had to assemble, he would be happy to come along. So we were set to go…

The drive to Kingston was the first time he and I had ever been alone together in the car, and while that makes some people uneasy, I was delighted to have that time to get to talk with him 1:1 and have his company. The drive was about 3.5 hours one way, and we bonded over car karaoke and various discussions about life, love and anything else you could think of! I really quite enjoyed the time in the car, and the whole day was filled with fond memories and moments. I was able to show him around Kingston, and we were able to get a lot of my stuff moved in and assembled for my new apartment. What I remember most was talking about the things we had never before; stories of growing up, past relationships and friendships, and future life goals. We talked for hours, not just because we had to, but the conversations kept flowing. He was such a tremendous help with moving, and I had learned so much about him that I never knew before. When we finally left to go home it was very late, but we continued to talk, laugh and crack jokes. It was a very special moment that I am tremendously thankful for. By offering his free time and day to me, he was really offering me so much more.

This experience was when our friendship levelled up and I knew that no matter the circumstance or situation, I could rely on him as a friend; not just because I was dating his best friend, but because we were friends too. Now we have been friends for about 14 years, and I couldn’t imagine my life without him. He and his wife are two of the closest friends my husband and I have, and we adore both of them so much. Thinking about that day in Kingston sparks great conversation and reflection on my relationships with those I adore and love: when was that moment when our friendship engaged to the next level?

If you’re reading this thinking about your own relationships and trying to pinpoint that pivotal moment in a friendship or relationship you have with someone, I encourage you to talk to that person about it. You might find that when they engaged “next level friendship” might be a different time, place and event than yours. It can lead to some really fascinating and meaningful conversation! Just like in video games, you unlock so many cool things when you level up.

So to my friend reading this, if you do, thank you for all your friendship (and for building that Ikea dresser with me; even if we assembled the drawer the wrong way!) Bahaha.

Being The Best Woman is Not Just For the Day…

manda_faromeiro

Just like 2015, 2018 was the year of weddings. Three sets of friends got married this year, and it was quite the experience. Actually, it was more than just an experience, it was a long year of experiences. Honestly, I could write for hours and hours about how different each of these wedding experiences was for me and how different they were from each other, but perhaps another day…

I am going to dedicate this blog entry on the last of the weddings I attended this year. But before we get to September 2018, I want to take you back a little bit.

I became friends with the groom in 2007 while we were both attending Nipissing University. I won’t elaborate on how our friendship evolved over time, but I will highlight some key points. When I met the groom, we instantly clicked. We had the same type of humour, were both history majors (and nerds), and had many shared interests. Like any good relationship, the more you get to know each other the more you learn new things not only about each other but because of each other. When you’re away from home, the friendships you form at school instantly mean that much more because those friends become your second family. You become very attached to these people, at least I did.

Summers were hard. You got used to seeing these people so often over the school year; they lived in the same building as you or you had the same classes, and they could come over at any time and stay over until 4 am, even if you had 8:30 am class the next day. Those bonds and those friendships are even more special because they are tested and tested in the most stressful of circumstances; not only are you away from home, buried in homework, essays or exams, but you’re also under pressure to make the most of your time at school while also buckling down so that you can graduate and get settled into your career. Ugh, more on that in a future post…

The years at Nipissing passed and we found ourselves graduated and living on the opposite ends of the province; okay a tad dramatic but we were living over 5 hours away. Luckily, my graduate program landed me in Kingston, so for a year we actually only lived 2 hours away – and you bet we made the most of it! But there did come a time again where we were indeed 5 hours apart, catching up over iChat (whoa, do I sound uncool?) or long elaborate facebook posts or messages, and phone calls too! Regardless we did our best to stay connected and involved in each other’s lives.

I am so thankful that we were able to stay friends through all those years and all those experiences. I am even more thankful that as the years continue to pass that we are able to share even more experiences and memories. I would be lying if I said that being asked to be the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding was a surprise to me, but nevertheless being asked was still heartwarming and flattering.

When I was asked to be the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding, it wasn’t a surprise to me because I knew the kind of friendship we had, and of course most people want their best friends to stand by their side on their wedding day, and I was delighted to be one of those best friends. Anyone who knows the groom would also not be surprised by this choice, yet it blew my mind how many random people still found this concept so shocking.

The number of times I heard the comment, “Really? The Best Woman? That’s interesting…”  or “Oh, there’s no Best Man? Hmmm.” and even, “Well what does the bride think about that? That’s not traditional.” was alarming. Is it really surprising to people that in 2018 men and women can be best friends? Why is society still stuck in these traditional wedding rules and expectations? And why does anyone who does anything “non-traditional” have to justify or explain themselves?

The truth is this. Being the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding was one of the best experiences of my life. When I got married, the amount of love and support I felt from my wedding party was incredible. I promised myself that if I ever got asked to be in another wedding party that I would do everything I could to make them feel as loved and special as my wedding party made me feel. I have had the privilege of being at several weddings, be it as a bridesmaid, maid of honour, matron of honour and now the best woman. The greatest thing about taking on these roles is getting to see all the behind the scenes moments leading up to the moments that everyone else gets to see. Not only do you witness these behind the scene moments, but you get to be part of making them too.

The adventures leading up to my friend’s wedding were magnificent. As a trio, we were able to take a road trip to Myrtle Beach and make hundreds of new memories and inside jokes. We relived some of our fondest undergrad memories by revisiting old stomping grounds’ and we continued to have fun and be ridiculous. This friendship was such a journey; it had many pit stops along the way to get us to the big day in September. We didn’t stop believing, and we held onto that feeling… yes that was totally a Journey reference!

The wedding day was magic. Three friends sharing drinks, laughs, rocking out to Tom Petty, Hall & Oates, and many other 80s tracks, while reflecting on the moments that got us to that very day.

Being the Best Woman in my friend’s wedding was years in the making. If you would have asked me in 2007 if I thought I would be there the day he got married, I would have said yes. Sometimes you just know, and I knew from the day I met him, that he was a friend for keeps. I know that he will read this blog, so when he does there is just one last thing to say:

Thank you! Thank you for giving me the honour of being one of the Best Women in your life. Asking me to be your Best Woman wasn’t a role that concluded when September ended. I have been and will continue to be one of those people you can count on today and every tomorrow.

The Internet Keeps Telling Me I Don’t Have Time for Friends After 30.

manda_faromeiro

Like me, you’ve probably scrolled past a meme or two highlighting the “sad” truths about becoming an adult. A lot of these posts seem to be mostly about two things: how our childhood punishments are now our adult goals or how as adults we don’t have time for anything, especially not friends or social life. Depending on the day, sometimes I’ll laugh and other times, I keep on scrolling.

Yesterday, I came across this one and it literally made me laugh-out-loud, but it wasn’t one of those “it’s funny ’cause it’s true” type of laughs and here’s why…

A very good friend of mine, one who has been in my life for over 12 years, is one of those friends who you can go from real talk to ridiculous all in the same sentence. Over the years we have talked about almost everything and anything under the sun. I am sure you’re reading this thinking, “okay, yeah we all have a friend or two like that.” And you’re not wrong. But, have you ever had an engaging and deep conversation about what friendship truly means? Can you define it? Can it be defined? What does it mean to really have a friendship with someone? I’m not trying to be philosophical here, I’m honestly asking you to think about it because I have. This friend I speak of, we’ve had this conversation, many, many times, and we continue to have this conversation again and again.

What’s crucial about these kinds of questions, and trying to define what friendship really means is how much the answers evolve. The answers aren’t universal either. What I need and how I manage or nourish one friendship doesn’t necessarily work for the others. Sure, the same basic foundations need to be there, but the level of attention, time, and communication differ. This isn’t always easy, but honestly, it’s also not that hard.

In the past I’ve had coworkers, even family members comment to me, “Wow, another (insert party/birthday/wedding/event)? You have too many friends.” Sometimes I’d laugh it off, but most of the time I’d reply, “Yeah. What a good problem to have!” No sarcasm. It is a good problem to have. I pride myself on the relationships and friendships I’ve built and maintained throughout my life. Yes, I’ve had many friends come and go, some of them for good, and some of them come back. I acknowledge that my personality can be polarizing at times, and I learned very early in life that not everyone is going to like me, and that is really okay. I also learned that you can grow out of friendships and that friendships can’t be forced. Please don’t ever force it, especially as an adult! We are all busy, and each of us has our own definition of what it means to be busy. None of us are really busier than the next person, because our perspectives and perceptions of what being “busy” means are personal.

I don’t expect my friends who just had a baby this year to have the same kind of “busy” schedule that I do or my friend who just got a promotion at his job in the city. I don’t have to worry about my relationship with these people because there is a mutual understanding of the kind of friendship we have together. Sure, we don’t see each other as often as we used to, but when we do, the conversation is meaningful and satisfying. The friendship is more than just reminiscing about old memories and stories, it’s also about sharing news and telling tales of current events that took place in our lives. Ultimately it’s about accepting and understanding that we are not the same people we were ________ years ago, nor should we be!

The point of this post wasn’t a humble brag about how great my friends and friendships are, and it wasn’t meant to make anyone reading this feel like having a lot of friends is important. What is important is having meaningful friendships. Meaningful friendships with your spouse, parents, siblings, roommates, classmates, coworkers, or whoever in your life is important to you. Also, understanding what makes that friendship meaningful to both of you. Quality over quantity!

Not that any of us should take the internet too seriously, but I am sure some of you read that meme above and the idea of entertaining or hanging out with 12 people at one time exhausted you. That’s okay. Reading that meme could have also delighted you. That’s okay too. Ultimately I hope what you take away from this post is this: friendship means different things to different people. 

Sorry internet, I do indeed have time for friends in my 30s. It’s a choice I make and one that is a priority to me. Priorities shift from time to time, and that’s okay because sooner or later they’ll shift again.

What traits in a friendship are important to you? If you want to chat about it, I’d be happy to listen and engage in conversation!