Tag: reflecting

A 2010s Sendoff: Recapping the Last 10 Years (Part 3):

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2015
I’m biased when I say that this was the best year of the decade, but that’s truly how I feel. This year was jam-packed with fun, adventures, celebrations, love and pure epicness. 2015 began with a few more snowboarding sessions, gameboard days turning into nights, and many things wedding- like saying “yes to the dress” after only trying on a few! March Madness included celebrating group birthdays, finding bridesmaids’ dresses, catching a concert or two and some Raptors’ games (we even got to meet Damon Stoudamire). Time was flying by, but it’s no surprise with so many wonderful events happening, and the biggest party of the summer was going to go down in a few short months.

In Spring, there was an epic paintball adventure for a good friend’s bachelorette party, followed by a menu tasting for my wedding with family, a getaway to Port Carling to visit our best friends, more attempts at golf, another concert (or two), and suit shopping with the groomsmen for our wedding. It wouldn’t be the 2010s without a few more Blue Jays games, and wedding season was officially on with my cousin’s wedding in June. June also meant another wonderful birthday celebration, as well as my brother’s graduation, exploring new provincial parks, and a dress fitting or two.

One month to go before our wedding, July began with the most amazing bachelorette weekend ever; I truly could not have asked for or planned a weekend that was so much fun. I headed to Niagara Falls with some of my favourite gal pals for three days of laughs, love and adventure. My BFF and my MOH (Maid of Honour) planned a night of interactive party games, followed up a full day of an Amazing Race style scavenger hunt that had two teams racing all up, down and around Niagara Falls, and closing it out with a superb dinner and night of dancing! Anyone who knows me, knows that I am near impossible to surprise, and being such a planner, to have someone take over all control of planning my bachelorette party was difficult for me, but she truly hit a grand slam home-run with that weekend! Truly one of the best weekends of my life. Believe it or not, I was totally brought to tears that weekend, not only because I was given a special keepsake scrapbook with messages and photos from all my gal pals, but in all reality, growing up with so many guy friends, I never thought that I would have so many amazing ladies in my life to call my good friends and celebrate my bachelorette with me; oh and facetiming my cousin/bridesmaid in Newfoundland in the weekend also made me cry; another rare sight.

It was finally August which means we were days away from our wedding. Most of the days leading up to the wedding were pretty standard stuff: pick up the dress, pick up the suits, drop off the centerpieces to the flourist, get the rehearsal done, then contain your excitement for the biggest party of the summer! My husband and I are truly blessed because no two people could have felt more love on our wedding day than the two of us; its cliche but it’s true. Being together for almost 10 years by our wedding, everyone had built-up excitement and enthusiasm for our big day. With all the “you’re finally getting married” lines out of the way, our wedding was also a great opportunity for my family to get together and celebrate something wonderful; for the first time in years both my mom’s and dad’s sides of the family were under the same roof, laughing, smiling and catching up. Walking into the hall, you could feel all the joy, love, and positive emotions in the room, and it’s a feeling I will never forget. August 15th 2015 was a scorcher day, weather wise, so thank goodness for an indoor wedding venue and an open-bar! We celebrated our wedding day with about 175 friends and family, ate way too much delicious food, and drank all the thirst quenching beverages in sight! When the clock struck midnight we ate a little more and continued to dance the late night away. The next day, we travelled to Great Wolf Lodge in Niagara Falls for a little post-wedding getaway with our wedding party; our best and closest friends supported us so much through our entire relationship and the wedding planning process we wanted to thank them but also celebrate an extra special way with them for getting us married. Incase you couldn’t tell, we’re big kids at heart so waterslides and hanging out playing games is an ideal weekend for us; we had an absolute blast!

In Fall 2015 there was no slowing down, as two of our dear friends would also be tying the knot; one in September and another in October. There was also another successful Client Appreciation Party thrown by my brother and sister-in-law for their real estate business clients; which started in 2013 and was growing in numbers each year. Round out October with another concert, and what would become an annual tradition Halloween bash at our house! November brought upon a new apartment warming party for our friends, and yes, another road trip to Ottawa where we’d discover a hidden gem winery and the epic Diefenbunker museum. We cannot forget those epic board game nights too.

Just when you thought 2015 couldn’t possibly fit any more epicness into it, Star Wars was back in theatres for the first time in 10 years! Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens was released and really, the force awoke in almost everyone; what an exciting time! We closed out the year with what would become another annual tradition: Friendship Christmas. With the decade half over, it was difficult to picture what other events might occur that would be as life changing as the last few years. 2015 was one of the happiest years of my life, so 2016 had some pretty big shoes to fill. It was unlikely that it would match that bar but it came pretty close.

2016
Most of 2016 started off with the same likeness as 2015; much snowboarding and game nights and new experiences like escape rooms! In February, Jeff and I would visit Ochi Rios, Jamaica for our honeymoon in what would be the most pampered and relaxing experience of my life; I am forever thankful for how astounding that vacation was! A honeymoon really is a once in a lifetime experience, and having a private pool, butler service and such amazing food and drink at our fingertips was overwhelming, but in a good way! In addition to relaxing poolside and at the beach, we were able to visit Dunns River for the day. Our honeymoon was wonderful because we got to spend time away from everyday life and we got to do it together; a nice reminder to slow down and take in the little moments. Taking our honeymoon 6 months after our actual wedding was also a great refresher of those exciting feels you get on your wedding day!

After our honeymoon, Jeff and I visited the humane society and picked out a new furry friend to bring home. Initially we were told this adorable little white and grey kitty was a girl, so we named her Zelda; my husband is a huge Legend of Zelda fan. A week later when we took Zelda to the vet, we found out that Zelda was actually a boy. For a day or two, The Cat Formally Known as Zelda had no new name, but eventually we decided on Hobbes; like the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes. I was so overjoyed to have a cat back in my life, and to this day we love and adore Hobbes dearly.

Spring 2016 brought on live wrestling events, another concert or two, some treetop trekking, another Raptors playoff run, more exploring of our provincial parks, a friend’s baby shower, and an epic archery tag birthday party for yours truly! I was also asked to be a bridesmaid in my dear friends wedding, which was going to be in January 2017, so there were a handful of bridal preparations throughout this year that I was helping the bride-to-be get checked off her list. A few days after my birthday, my best friend and I took a road trip to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania to catch the Blue Jays on the road, but also partake in some American history. I love road trips because they bring out some of the best conversations, carpool karaoke sessions, and just an overall grand adventure you’ll remember for a lifetime. Being history majors, we adored how rich in history Philadelphia was from the liberty bell, to Independence Hall, and the National Constitution Centre, and Eastern State Penitentiary, much fun was had! Yes, we climbed those famous Rocky-steps up the museum, and of course we indulged in some Philly Cheesesteak! The Jays games were blast; ballpark food is out of this world in the States, and we may have fallen in love with the Phillie Phanatic. If you’ve never been to Philadelphia, I highly recommend it!

Summer kicked off with my brother’s wedding, a cottage bachelorette weekend for my dear friend, more outdoor adventures at some provincial parks, continued treetop trekking adventures, friends’ having babies, another round of Rogers’ Cup tennis, and cottage weekends. For the first time in forever, we got to spend the long-weekend away at the cottage with friends, and oh what laughs were had! Truly a great little getaway with some really amazing people. A cousin’s wedding would close out the summer, as would some natural rock climbing adventures; note to anyone wanting to try this- it’s quite an experience but it definitely takes a toll on your body- especially if you do not exercise or climb regularly; worth a try though if you love outdoor adventures.

Before I go on any further about the wonderful things that continued to happen in 2016, I would like to take a moment and touch upon the other things going on in my life at this time. Having been at my job for about four years now, I had taken on much more responsibility with every passing school year and it was beginning to take its toll on me. Long work days followed by after hours phone calls from staff, coupled with continuous lack of staff to cover programs had me stretched out pretty thin attempting to do my job in addition to that of the front-line staff who were either ill, needed time off or were practically non-existent. I enjoy being challenged in the workplace and I face new responsibilities with a positive attitude, but day in and day out of the same constant problems with no support from head office to help our small team was equal parts physically and emotionally draining. While I adored my supervisors very much, we were all under a great deal of stress trying to juggle all the roles, paperwork, staff and parents that were knocking at our door each day. The circumstances of my career took a toll on me because I didn’t want to walk away from a challenge and I was learning so much valuable experience and skill set that could never be taught in a classroom. More importantly, I wasn’t sure where I would go next if I left the company; although I was a teacher by trade, I was certain that going back on the supply list or being in the classroom wasn’t exactly what I wanted. I took much of 2016 as a chance to think more clearly about what would be next for me as a career, but more on that later!

September 2016 was another magical time because I would return to Walt Disney World with my best friend and a good friend of ours from Nipissing who moved overseas would be joining us! We ventured to Epcot for the Food and Wine Festival, indulging in delicious food from all over the world throughout the World Showcase exhibit. We met a ton of characters in Magic Kingdom, took a Jungle Cruise, ate lunch with the friends from the Hundred Acre Woods, and visited Animal Kingdom for the first time! The highlight of our trip was Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween Party, which was an after-dark event at Magic Kingdom where all guests could dress up and go trick-or-treating throughout the park, meet villains and ride some attractions! We dressed up as the Aliens from Toy Story; so many people loved our costumes, especially Buzz Lightyear. Such a magnificent vacation it was, especially because it would be the last time I would see my friend from overseas for a long time!

The closing months of 2016 included our second annual Halloween Party, a few more board game nights, escape rooms, and more frequent hockey games where my nephew was the star player! A wine and cheese night was thrown into the mix, as was a bridal shower/fiesta for the January bride-to-be, another road trip to Ottawa, and yes- another Star Wars story (Rogue One). Last but not least, a lovely Friendship Christmas was had, followed by a pajama party New Years Eve. 2016 had some big shoes to fill, and all things considered, it didn’t disappoint. The year continued to strengthen many bonds made years prior, while introducing some new people into my life as well. Friends of mine were starting or growing their families, and changes were brewing! With my dear friends wedding mere days away, I was excited for all that 2017 would bring even if it was a tad scary! Stay tuned…

These are a Few of My Favourite Things: 90s Edition

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The release of the live action Lion King movie this past week really had me thinking about all the things I loved while growing up in the era of the original Lion King film. There are many things that set the 90s apart from other decades, but as I’ve learned the older I get, what is old will someday be cool again, at least for a little while. I thought it would be fun to talk about some of my favourite things from the 90s.

Movies & Television
As a young child in the 90s, there are many shows and movies I remember holding a special place in my heart and a semi-permanent home in my VCR. Of course, the 90s were a great time for Disney films: The Lion King, Aladdin, Pocahontas, Hercules, Beauty and the Beast, Toy Story, A Bug’s Life, and The Mighty Ducks just to name a few. Apart from Disney, there were also a number of movies I really loved growing up: Jurassic Park, Home Alone, TMNT, Dumb and Dumber, Space Jam, and Mrs. Doubtfire. Whether these films are special because of their nostalgic value, or if they are just really damn good, just thinking about them brings me joy. When I think of these films, I reflect on what emotions they evoke and the people I remember watching them with. Whether it be hanging out with my brothers watching Dumb and Dumber for the twelfth time, singing along to Just Around the Riverbend with my cousin, watching Home Alone at Christmas with my family, or acting out the fight scenes in TMNT, these films never fail to put me a good mood!

Just like film, there were many great television shows in the 90s that are iconic and special to me. I grew up watching The Simpsons, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Seinfeld, Full House, The X-Files, Saved by the Bell, Family Matters, Home Improvement, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Doug, 3rd Rock from the Sun, Frasier, Power Rangers, Magic School Bus, Married with Children – wow I really feel like I am forgetting some – television in the 90s was epic! Thanks to services like Netflix, it’s easier than ever nowadays to reminisce and rewatch all of your favourite shows from the past. I remember coming home after a long day of school, playing outside, and finishing homework to watching some of these great shows after dinner. Of course, I cannot forget Saturday morning cartoons! Ohhh the memories!

Fun & Games
Growing up in the 90s was a blast, much because of all the awesome toys, games and gadgets. Who can forget Sega Genesis and Sega Game Gear, Nintendo 64, Skip-Its, Super Soakers and NERF, Barbies and Polly Pockets; just to name a few. How about in gym class when the teacher let you play on those scooters? EPIC! Or when it was a Friday afternoon and you had some time to kill before dismissal so you played Heads Up-7-Up. Are you feeling nostalgic yet? I think it’s a safe bet that if you were a kid or pre-teen in the 90s you surely remember playing MASH with your friends. Lucky for me, I didn’t end up living in that Shack with Kevin from the Backstreet Boys…

Food
When I think about some of my favourite childhood foods and snacks I cannot help but laugh to myself because there were definitely some weird things that you clearly would only eat as a kid. Dunkaroos, Gushers, Warheads, Ring Pops, Pixie Sticks – what a rush! Remember how awesome it was when you went to a birthday party and got some of these wicked treats in your lootbag? In our house it was a treat when you got to have a Pizza Pocket, or even Jos Louis, or cereals like Fruity Pebbles and French Toast Crunch. Now I know that many of these things are still available in the grocery store now, but for me, they really symbolize growing up in the 90s.

Fashion
There is a part of me that wishes I was a teenager in the 90s so that I could have had more “creative” control in regards to my wardrobe. What I absolutely loved about the 90s was how much neon colours took over! As someone who adores colourful things, neon coloured clothing and accessories are my favourite. Some other 90s iconic fashion pieces were scrunchies, overalls, bomber jackets, and platform sneakers. You bet you can find most of these items in my closet today- and that brings me a lot of joy! When I think about fashion in the 90s I immediately think about The Spice Girls because I idolized everything about those fabulous girls. I recall begging to get some platform shoes and when I got a pair, I couldn’t walk around as casually as Scary Spice, but boy did I practice! Even if some of these fashion pieces weren’t back in style, you’d still likely find me wearing them nowadays anyway.

What decade is iconic for you? Are there things you loved about the 90s that I forgot to mention above? What are your favourite things from the 90s? I’d love to read your comments!

A Birthday Appreciation Post

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For those who know me well, and even those who have only known me for 5 minutes, it’s not a secret how much I love my birthday! It is certain that I always have, and always will love my birthday. While most people say that once you run out of 20s, you’ll stop counting your birthdays, lying about your age, and even refrain from celebrating or making a big deal out of your big day, but I can say in my heart of hearts that this isn’t going to happen to me because I think birthdays are so important and every single one is worth celebrating. Let me rant a bit about why I not only love my own birthday, but birthdays in general. I just turned 31 on June 10th, and I had a really wonderful day; sorry for the delay on writing this blog! Hopefully you’ll think about your own birthday a little bit differently by the end of this blog post…

Remember being a kid and getting so excited about planning your birthday party? Whether it be at the local bowling alley, McDonalds (because that was a thing- even though I never had my birthday there), Chuck-E-Cheese, the movie theatre, a home party with your friends, cousins and family members, or even a sleepover with your pals or hanging out a local hotspot- whatever the place or case, birthdays were something to be celebrated when we were kids, so why does that mentality stop? Maybe we don’t need balloons and loot bags anymore, or even silly games (if that isn’t your thing), but why stop going out or staying in and doing something fun with your friends/family just because you’re an adult? I know that sometimes birthdays, like other times of year (like Christmas or Thanksgiving) can bring up rough times or memories for some people, but I think the purpose of birthdays is often forgotten. Your birthday is a celebration of you – you coming into this world and everyone in your life who is important to you should want to remind you of how loved and special and important you are. As a kid, celebrating your birthday was about hanging out with your friends and family and doing fun things. Yeah, it was also about gifts, because as kids that is how we think, but now that we’re older the act of gift giving (and receiving) means that someone wanted to get you something special, something that you’ll really like, or something that makes them think of you. Celebrating your birthday is a way for those in your life to make you feel loved, appreciated, valued, and cared for – and honestly, we don’t get enough of that in our life.

Remember how special you felt as a kid when all those people came to celebrate you? I don’t think that feeling should stop. Life is too short not to celebrate another year on this earth. Life is too short not to show those you care about that they are worth celebrating. I know that sometimes we can all have a bad day that turns into a bad month, that stretches out to a bad year. However, I think if we took the time to think about how a birthday is another 365 chances for changes, better days ahead, and/or new adventures, opportunities or things, we would all feel a little bit better (and make others feel better too). Your birthday is a chance to be a little selfish, and I think this is a good thing. The older we get, the more we become more giving towards others rather than ourselves; we become harder on ourselves for not making deadlines, falling a bit behind, not getting caught up or comparing ourselves to others in our own age group or whom we grew up with. We tend to do less for ourselves and more for others; this is especially the case if/when we have children or take on stressful jobs or careers. Ultimately, we can become very hard on ourselves, and when your birthday comes around, it should be a time to reflect on what you did accomplish, what changes you made, what lessons you learned, but also who was there alongside with you, what new friendships formed, or what old ones gained strength. Yes, you should totally be selfish on your birthday- treat yourself to a day at the spa, go out for that dinner, have not one but two scoops of ice cream – do something that day you don’t get to do everyday – and I REALLY encourage you to take your birthday off of work because who really wants to work on their birthday? You deserve a day off, even if you’re going to just stay in pyjamas all day – you do you!

I love my birthday because it is a reminder of my personal story and all the things I have had the privilege of experiencing in my 31 years of living. There are no guarantees in life, and without running the risk of sounding morbid or sad, birthdays are a gift that you don’t exactly know if you’ll be getting again next year. Life can get in the way. Many cultures see birthdays as a rite of passage, and depending on your background you may celebrate your day differently or some ages in particular are more important than others. My birthday is a celebration of my life; another year of changes, memories, ups and downs, adventures, and while it might not all be great, it is all part of the story that makes up my life. Being a generally positive person, it is easier for me to see the good that can come out of bad situations or circumstances, and I recognize that not everyone is like this; another reason why a birthday is a great reminder to someone of just how wonderful, valued, important and great they are – and that they can get through anything with love and support. My husband, family and friends make me feel very loved and appreciated, especially on my birthday and the more chances I get to celebrate with them is another chance to be thankful and appreciative of all the things I have shared with them.

As someone who loves their birthday, I make it a goal of mine to ensure that others in my life feel loved, valued, appreciated and special on their own birthday as much as I feel on my own. I understand that not everyone likes attention on themselves, so not everyone wants a big party or get together to celebrate another trip around the sun. I encourage you who read this to think about your own thoughts and feelings about your birthday. Reflect on some birthdays you remember that were fun, exciting, and really joyous moments. I am sure you can think of many. I also encourage you to think of some birthdays that maybe weren’t so great, and reflect on what happened to make it so; think about how far you’ve come from that point, what has changed and what new things have you been able to experience or see or do because of another passing year? A personal goal of mine is to encourage those who are close to me to love and want to celebrate their birthdays even more as the years go on. I think we all need a reminder of how important we are to those around us and that your birthday marks the day you were brought into the world to change the lives of those you’ve crossed paths with; whether you see it that way or not -it’s true!

I have had some incredible birthdays in my 31 years and I have my family, husband and friends to thank for many of them. Whether it be Spice Girls themed, running around a laser or archery tag arena as an adult, carnivals, road trips or vacations, and heck yeah – even getting engaged on my birthday – I have had many incredible birthdays and hope to have many incredible more!

My Journey as a Toronto Raptors Fan (and What the Eastern Conference Win Means to Me)

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Whether you’re a fan of basketball or not, I am sure by now you’ve heard the news about the Toronto Raptors advancing to the NBA Finals for the first time in franchise history. As someone who has enjoyed basketball since I was young, witnessing this moment was tremendously special, and I’ll elaborate on why…

I first started taking basketball more seriously when I was about 12 years old. I began following players, Michael Jordan of course, but also Allen Iverson. Then, I began to root for my teams, those other key players of the late 90s and early 2000s era, and made time in my schedule to watch the games on television, as well as those novelty events like the NBA All Star Game and Skills Competitions. I always rooted for the Toronto Raptors; they were the hometown team, I loved the jerseys, the colours, and while I was NOT a Vince Carter fan, I still cared about what was going on with the team. While my heart always belonged to the Toronto Raptors, I also really enjoyed watching and rooting for the Sacramento Kings (the Bibby, Webber, Stojakovic era was fun) and the Detroit Pistons – who could forget Big Ben Wallace, Billups, Prince, Rip Hamilton – I mean six consecutive Eastern Conference Finals between 2003–2008 is insane. These teams really put into motion my passion for basketball; I always enjoyed playing on my school teams and for fun with friends, but these teams made basketball just as exciting and fun to watch as it was to play.

Seeing the Kings and Pistons have success was exciting, as it always is when a team you like is doing well, but it never felt as good as seeing what successes the Toronto Raptors were having. The early 2000s were coined as the Vince Carter era, and while again, I didn’t care for him, it was great to see the hype about Toronto basketball. I loved seeing how Alvin Williams, Jerome Williams and Davis all played together, despite Carter getting injured in the later 2001-2002 season, and let’s not forget making the Raptors making the playoffs! These highs were contagious! Imagine how I was feeling when Detroit and Toronto faced off against each other that year in the first round? Watching two teams you like go head-to-head was an emotional roller-coaster; a win-win situation really, but deep in my heart, I always wanted Toronto to pull out on top – root, root, root for the home team, ya know? More importantly, there was something special about seeing Toronto rise up, building momentum, and have the potential to be as great as some of those iconic NBA teams – I mean they could be as iconic as the Lakers some day, right? The plight of the Toronto sports fan is always setting that bar waaaaaaaaaaay high at the beginning of the season and believing your team can really do it, despite having that bar fall down and smack you in the head year after year. This is just the narrative of a Toronto sports fan right? Well, there was still hope.

Once Vince Carter left Toronto with the tears of many fans carrying him away, what were we to look forward to as Raptor fans? Rebuild phase? Really terrible Win records? 24-58 anyone? Well, as a fan you knew the sun would rise again, and when Chris Bosh came to town, it was starting to look a little promising. The sun was peeking through the clouds. Personally, I was a huge Bosh fan and loved seeing him on the court. He definitely was the new face of the franchise, and he kept hope alive and entertaining basketball afoot. But then it got pretty terrible, pretty quick. Sometimes I cringe when I hear names like Bargnani, Calderon, or Garbajosa. Another struggling period, but it didn’t look like it was going to last for long. Why had I become so emotionally invested in basketball? Well, the truth is – it was exciting, captivating, and the ups and downs kind of made you wanting more. When your team is down, the only place left to go is up. In an interesting way, the journey of the Toronto Raptors felt very similar to my own experiences on my school basketball teams; for the 6 years that I played, we had some really amazing games and finishes, and other years we were absolutely terrible.

There were a number of years where I remember watching the Raptors and thinking, we definitely are not going to be in playoff contention this year, but let’s see how things play out. Sure, there were many uneventful or exciting games, but I always made sure to keep paying attention; things were going to change. I was sure of it. I appreciated the Raptors of 2007/2008 era; a team showing improved defense and above all else fantastic team chemistry. This is what I remember the most when I think about what kept me engaged in Raptors’ basketball; the team looked like they were really having a lot of fun out there and truly playing as a solid unit. I remember those 2007 playoffs well; it had been nearly 5 years since the team had won a playoff game but the momentum felt short lived when they ultimately lost to the Nets 4-2; to rub salt in the wound, Carter was playing for the Nets at the time- boo! Before long it was 2010 and we were rebuilding again… good things come to those who wait, right? How does one stick through all of these changes? MY EMOTIONS!

Moving along, when Bosh left Toronto, I was quite upset. I remember part of me was beginning to lose a bit of faith in what would be Toronto basketball. As I sit here and write this, I recognize that I am very emotionally invested in basketball even though it has nothing to do with me personally – bahaha – this is strange. I think I felt that Toronto would never be able to lock in an All-Star player for long because we were forever going to be left out of the NBA finals and continuing to miss every opportunity to win the conference finals. I didn’t want to give up hope, and I really wished for the best for Toronto; how many times can you get hyped up for playoff time only to be knocked out again and again… how many times you say?

Now this is probably getting to my most favourite era of Toronto Raptors basketball, and once again it has a lot to do with team chemistry. Demar DeRozan and Kyle Lowry were instantly fan favourites, and these BFFs were reminding us all how to fall in love with the game and your team. Without boring anyone with stats, this era saw Division titles in 2014, 2015, 2016 and 2018. It was great to see such success, but for me, seeing the team really have fun out there and being so great with the fans was so important. The Toronto Raptors of these years made fans feel like the city and its fans were priority, not the money they were making in their contracts. These years were exceptional years as a long-time fan, not only because it felt as though the rebuild years were behind us, but because of all the excitement that came from watching the talent. Remember Demar scoring 52 points against the Milwaukee Bucks? Seeing your home team succeed and making the rest of the league take notice was exhilarating! The Raptors were making history; 59 franchise record wins in one season! For the first time in forever, it really felt like the team was going to go all the way…

The devastating loss to the Cavaliers in the second round of the playoffs in 2018 was heartbreaking, and had many fans, myself included, questioning what was to be done with this team. For a solid unit of players putting up impressive stats in the regular season, we were falling short in the playoffs. Was it coaching? Was it nerves? Was it mind games because we had to keep playing against Lebron James? A lot of people demanded some answers, but it shocked the system when we found out that the Raptors coach, Dwayne Casey was fired in May of 2018. As a fan, I felt that one pretty deeply – I always felt that Casey really connected with the team and proved to the city that he always had our backs when we were frustrated with bullshit referee calls or whatever nonsense was pinned against us as the only Canadian team in the league. Just when I felt I had come to terms with losing coach Casey and eager awaiting to see who would take his place, another shock to my system took place. Demar DeRozan was traded from Toronto. This one hurt. It hurt bad. Demar loved the city of Toronto and the fans, and that love was reciprocated immensely. Demar wanted to stay in Toronto for his entire career, and loyalty like that is hard to find! The reason the trade hurt was also due to the fact that it was unclear how healthy Kawhi Leonard was going to be and what his future in Toronto was going to look like. As a dedicated fan for so many years, it wasn’t important to get players just for a championship title and then for them to leave when its over; it was important to see players investing their hustle and heart into the city, and most importantly showing the fans respect. Afterall, the fans are the ones putting asses in the seats and showing up to support the team, and Lord knows we did our share through the good and bad times.

I remember having a good conversation with my brother about the whole Kawhi situation. I always value talking sports with my brother because he sure as hell knows a lot, and as a Raptors fan he thinks more logically and less emotionally than I do. My brother laid down some stats and we discussed some possible scenarios, and after our conversation, I was feeling a little less frustrated about the situation, but was still keeping my eyes on Kawhi. Anyone who knows me knows I still am pretty defensive about it. Ultimately, I just want everyone to remember that while Kawhi is doing some very impressive things, there is a bench full of players hustling and doing some really great things too – and many of whom were in Toronto before Kawhi. I could go on and on about this…

The past year has been a rollercoaster of emotions as a fan of the Toronto Raptors. The last few years have spoiled us, as we no longer hope to make the playoffs, but expect it and we demand to advance past the second round. Lowry and the boys said it best in all their interviews; we are happy but we are not satisfied. With all the talks of what Kawhi, Gasol, Green and Lin were going to do for our team, coupled with the power of Lowry, VanVleet, O.G, and Siakam, I had incredibly high hopes that the Raptors were going to go full-force this playoff season. These playoffs were the most intense Raptors basketball that I have ever witnessed. Incredibly close games, buzzer beating shots, amazing teamwork and hustle, and with every shot another reason to continue loving and pouring your soul into this franchise. I remember hours before Game 7 was about to start against the 76s, reflecting on my own thoughts as a fan, and writing a post about regardless what happened that night that I loved this team. I truly felt that in my heart. A loss would be hard to deal with, but I wasn’t going to let that take away any amazing memories of this 2018-2019 basketball season. When the Raptors beat the 76s in Game 7, I screamed louder than I ever screamed for anything in my life. I had a few tears roll down my face too. The energy was electric and it was unbelievable to think that once again we were going to the Eastern Conference finals. Writing this blog, I can’t help but smile and laugh to myself because I cannot believe how much the team has really been part of my life; almost without realizing how long I’ve been watching and rooting for them; waiting for a time like this.

When it came time for the Raptors to play Milwaukee, my emotions continued to be all over the place. I didn’t want to get so close to that Eastern Conference Championship and get swept in 4 games. It is so hard to put into words how much I wanted the team to succeed, knowing that apart from being a loyal fan and supporter, it was completely out of my control. It is weird to feel so nervous and excited, like you’re the one stepping out onto the court to play, yet all you are doing is watching. It was so intense! The Raptors had worked too hard all season long to go out AGAIN. We had seen this narrative before, and it was time for a new chapter to be written.

To avoid sounding repetitive, I can’t put into words the energy I was feeling watching Game 6 against the Bucks with my friends. I literally could not sit down for the entire second half of the game; the jumping, yelling, screaming, cheering, falling to the floor in nervousness, all of it was incredible intense! With the final seconds left in the fourth quarter the camera man panned over to capture Kyle Lowry’s emotions as he knew that he and the team were going to the NBA finals and were Eastern Conference Champions; that camera man deserves a raise because we all felt that. So many years of being so close. So many years of being so far off and rebuilding. So many years of trades, hoping to find a unit that would not only be strong together but strong enough to get us to the NBA Finals for the first time in franchise history. As the clock went down to zero and it was official, the screams and cheers and tears were all so real. Pinch me, I must be dreaming! The Toronto Raptors are going to the NBA Finals. What a time to be a fan! What a journey.

As we inch closer to Game 1 on Thursday against the defending NBA Champs, Golden State, the nerves go away a little more each day. I’m excited for what is to come of this series. I can’t imagine what it might feel like if the Raptors become NBA Champions. I’ve never witnessed or experienced this before, and that is what I like to remind myself. We may never witness this again. If that’s the case, we best enjoy the moment right now. Although as fans, we are happy, but we are not satisfied. I keep reminding myself of the years that came before this one; and it is part of the reason I wrote this blog post today. The Raptors being crowned the Eastern Conference Championship reminds me that dedication, time, trust, hustle make a difference, and together something great will come. As a Toronto Raptors fan, I have witnessed a lot of changes, a lot of excitement, a hell of a lot of frustration, confusion and unknowns, but ultimately it’s been a lot of fun and immensely entertaining. I cannot imagine supporting any other team as whole heartedly as I do these Toronto Raptors.

And so, if we win it all this year, let’s break out the salami and cheese, baby!

WE THE NORTH.

NORTH OVER EVERYTHING.

Watching 7+ Hours of Wrestling this Sunday Got Me Thinking…

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Fresh off of WWE’s biggest event of the year, Wrestlemania, I was feeling compelled to write my next blog on just what being a wrestling fan is all about, and why it’s really a lot of fun – at least for me! For starters, I cannot help but chuckle a bit as I write this, as many times in my life I have had many entertaining conversations with non-wrestling fans about how boring and fake wrestling is and how it’s a waste of time, or how silly it is to get caught-up in the storylines or characters. None of that is happening here! Let me tell you a bit about how wrestling, and in particular WWE, has been a special part of my life…

Growing up with brothers, I was exposed to the world of wrestling from an early age. I remember being as young as six or seven and playing with wrestling action figures and play-wrestling with my brother in the basement or living room; jumping off the armrest of the couch like it was the top rope or running from one wall to the other like we were running the ropes. These were all typical things brothers and sisters did while playing together, right? Well, they were in my house; but hey, it was the 90s! I always loved role playing as some of the wrestlers we were watching on TV. These wrestlers were animated characters with bold personalities and outfits, and they did some pretty cool things. What kid wouldn’t be drawn to that? Any wrestling fan can tell you, the 90s were such a ridiculously fun and gimmocky time (even more so than nowadays if you can believe it). Wrestlers had over-the-top outfits and personalities; it was easy to get caught up in the energy of The Ultimate Warrior, the flashiness of Shawn Michaels or Macho Man Randy Savage, or the exciting partnership of the Hart Foundation, while being intrigued (and a little spooked) by the eerie persona of the Undertaker. As a kid, watching wrestling was entertaining because there wasn’t anything on TV quite like it. Oh and I always loved role playing and putting on a show. Wrestling wasn’t just about the physicality and horseplay, there was always a story being told and something unique to see – it was very much about the next jaw dropping or electrifying moment. It is very exciting, and like any good television series or book, you want to see what’s going to happen next to these characters.

My appreciation for wrestling was not just about the occasional role playing in the livingroom to see who could do the best sharpshooter or stunner, my brother and I were very interested in the stories being told. When we got a little bit older, my brother and his friends created their own wrestling league where they all had their own character names, entrance songs/themes, and signature/finishing moves (including submission locks). I often helped as a referee or even announcer, as I was really the only girl (and noone was actually going to wrestle me). In addition, I got to help my brother out with brainstorming storylines and even designing belts and posters; whatever kinds of activities would still allow me to participate in the fun. We had created our own little world of wrestling, influenced by what we were watching on TV. The truth was, wrestling was a really fun pastime growing up. Whether we knew the results or matches were staged, it didn’t matter. We were entertained. Watching these characters on tv sparked our imaginations and creativity. At one point, my brother and I had even created our own magazine; writing short articles on the different wrestlers and creating ads for events or merchandise — just thinking about all of these things makes me laugh and smile! It really was a ton of fun; no different than role playing or acting out the adventures of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (or whatever other show you may have been watching growing up). Again, all typical things to do growing up, right? Bahah…

There are a few moments (like those I just described) that make me realize just how much wrestling was a valuable part of my childhood. Looking back, I can appreciate how much wrestling allowed me and my brothers to bond. I remember watching wrestling at home and having debates with my brother and Dad over some of these wrestling characters. In particular, my Dad was never a fan of Shawn Michaels or Goldust and made sure to let us hear about it every time they came on the TV. I recall getting the opportunity to watch a live show, and my oldest brother telling us about running into Sid Vicious in the bathroom or sitting ringside and going absolutely bonkers when the shattering glass hit and Stone Cold came storming down the ramp. These little moments were electrifying and all part of the bigger story of being a wrestling fan. As a fan, you live for those little moments.

When we got a little bit older, the role playing went away but the entertainment aspect of wrestling was still there. With age comes wisdom, so we began to understand more about how these storylines and characters came together. At times, the wow factor diminished, or the element of surprise wore off and we could begin predicting just what might happen at the end of the match. New personas evolved and old characters developed new attitudes. I would be lying if I said that there wasn’t a time where I lost a bit of interest in wrestling, and it wasn’t just because of the evolution of characters, there was just a little less time in my life for keeping up with the storylines.

In my twenties, my appreciation for wrestling was reborn. Like picking up an old favourite book series that continued on after you stopped reading, immersing myself in the storylines and characters that were now present in the WWE wasn’t easy. Some old favourites were still around, but there were plenty of new faces to see. In addition, the style of wrestling had evolved, and wrestlers had talent and skill unlike what had ever been seen before. Familiarizing myself with what was happening on the various programs took a bit of time, but once again, it was proving to be quite exciting! Definitely worth mentioning that there were far more women wrestlers around too; it wasn’t just about having pillow fights or pathetic gimmick matches that lasted 2 minutes! Women were becoming more visible on the roster, and not just as valets, but they were beginning to make waves and do incredible things! Chyna, Nattie, Lita, Trish Stratus and Beth Phoenix were notable women during the early stages of my wrestling fandom, but now the female locker room was filling up with remarkable talents and very noteworthy personas. As a woman, and a longtime fan of wrestling, it was a relief (and joy) to see so many women getting the television time and recognition of their male counterparts. I can’t help but wonder how my childhood experiences would have changed had I been able to grow up watching the likes of Sasha Banks, Charlotte Flair, Nia Jax and Becky Lynch.

Undoubtedly my experiences watching wrestling as a child differ from my experiences watching wrestling as an adult, but there are still some key similarities. This weekend, I found myself talking with a friend about the ridiculously long line-up that WWE had setup for Wrestlemania; with the show beginning at 5pm and set to wrap up after midnight. Who can possibly sit through over 7 hours of wrestling? Well, apart from the tens of thousands of people in the stadium, and the millions watching at home- me & my husband. Yes, it’s true, it’s damn true. As an adult, dedicating 7 hours in one day to something that isn’t related to work is not only baffling but also quite unheard of. Yet, something about wrestling continues to draw in our attention and keep us guessing, waiting, and watching in anticipation to see just what is going to happen next. That same appreciation and investment in those characters and personas I held as a child still exist because at the core of any great wrestling match is a compelling and captivating story. The same kinds of stories I loved to watch, witness, and create as a child are evolving with new main characters and personas today. Whether I’m thirteen or thirty, the stories and characters that set foot in the ring evoke emotion through engaging and entertaining events.

So, preparing for Wrestlemania weekend really got me thinking about how much I love wrestling, and how I never have been nor ever will be afraid to admit that I do. I’ve been fortunate enough to attend live events and immerse myself in the live atmosphere, surrounded by fans who get just as pumped up as I do when they hear that entrance music hit, or can’t help but jump around when that wrestler hits that finishing move. I’m thankful too for those friends in my life who get just as heated or passionate when discussing the latest storylines; and for a husband who grew up watching wrestling too! Together, we can share in the electrifying moments of glory, heartache, astonishment, and intense emotions. While I would be lying if I said that there were not many times where I was incredibly frustrated with WWE storytelling or decision making, one thing is certain – there is always something worth talking about!

Let’s Talk About Wearing Makeup…

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I felt compelled to write a blog about makeup because as someone who has been wearing it since I was about 13, it tends to be a topic that stirs up interesting conversation. My relationship with makeup is a long, somewhat interesting one. Many people who know me know that I am almost always wearing makeup; whether it’s simply foundation or a full face of makeup including winged eyeliner and lipstick, makeup is very much apart of my daily routine – and that isn’t a bad thing. Now, I am far from a beauty influencer, makeup artist or guru, and you won’t find me on a YouTube channel anytime soon talking about my favourite brands or doing a tutorial, but the truth is, I wear makeup because I want to – and I want to for a number of reasons. I am happy to talk about wearing makeup to anyone who asks…

When I first started wearing makeup, I was lucky that my mom was a beautician and counter-manager for Estee Lauder cosmetics. This meant that my mom could provide me with really great quality makeup, so I wouldn’t have to buy the drugstore brands and not know what exactly it was I was putting on my face. Hear me out, there is NOTHING wrong with drugstore brands, especially nowadays when you can get a great deal of awesome brands there, and brands like Maybelline, Covergirl etc have really upped their game. When I say drugstore brands, I am talking about those brands similar to what you’d now find at Claires or Ardenes stores that are targeted at young teens and feel very waxy, plasticy and well, just not what “real” makeup should feel like. Anyway, my mom was very “cool” and not opposed to me wearing makeup at my age, and because of her knowledge and expertise in the field, she taught me the basics about applying makeup. Back then, of course, wearing makeup to school meant some eyeshadow, mascara, and a little bit of foundation; nothing too intense. Teens these days are far more advanced that I ever was at that age when it came to applying makeup (I just learned how to contour about a year ago). Nevertheless, wearing makeup to me was normal, and quickly became part of my everyday routine as a teenager; and I had fun with it.

For most of my life, and even well into adulthood, I suffered (and still do suffer) from acne prone skin. Throughout most of my teen years, my acne was so unpredictable and I’ve had it literally everywhere on my face and for months and months at a time. I would be lying if I said that sometimes my choice to wear makeup wasn’t influenced by trying to cover up my pimples or imperfections or redness of my skin, because it very much was. I had been met with some criticism in my lifetime from people who think that wearing makeup made my skin condition worse, and that if I didn’t wear “so much makeup” my skin wouldn’t be the way that it was. Truthfully, these people were indirectly shaming me for choosing to wear makeup. If you think back, it may have happened to you too, and you may have even done it to someone you know without even realizing it. I was made to feel that my skin was the way it was because of the products I was putting on my face. These comments also made the assumption that makeup alone causes oily skin and breakouts, which anyone who has seen a dermatologist can tell you that it is way more complicated than that. Regardless, my acne prone skin wasn’t the only reason I was wearing makeup. I wasn’t trying to hide the fact I had acne, I just was trying to make it more of background detail on my canvas rather than the focal point…and is that really anyone’s business anyway?

Having an expert like my mom, as well as seeing doctors and dermatologists throughout the years helped me to see how to best apply makeup when dealing with acne and also the kinds of products and ingredients to look for when choosing makeup brands. Experiencing all the bouts of acne I did throughout my teens and twenties, caused some frustration with the whole makeup process. At times, my skin was very dry, and wearing the right makeup was challenging. I didn’t want to just wear makeup because of people making those comments to me, I still enjoyed wearing it, but wearing it correctly was sometimes a challenge and figuring out how to change up your makeup routine to suit your changing skin wasn’t so easy. For most people, the objective of wearing makeup isn’t to look like you’re wearing a lot of makeup, so trying to do this while dealing with dry skin, redness, scaring, or even pimples or breakouts wasn’t easy. I liked wearing makeup because I liked trying out different colours, and emphasizing different elements of my face with pops of colour or making them stand out. Again, I wanted to wear makeup, and it wasn’t just to cover up my “natural” “imperfect” face. Finding that balance made makeup complicated, especially when you are reminded by society and people who make up that society that nobody wants to be that girl who CLEARLY wears too much makeup. Right? She must have something to hide if she is always wearing makeup. She must not be that pretty since she is always wearing makeup. Wrong. So very wrong! Nobody in my family or in my circle of friends ever made me feel like I HAD to wear makeup, and if they did, that would be pretty shitty.

Part of the reason I enjoy talking to people about makeup is because I want people to feel that wearing makeup isn’t just about covering up or trying to look prettier than you are. It’s okay to want to wear makeup, whether you wear it everyday or only for special occasions, or just whenever you feel like it. It’s okay to want to experiment with it and try out new colours, new looks, and new products, without feeling like people will comment about how much makeup you are wearing or that you’re “actually” wearing makeup for once. How many times have you heard someone say to you (or someone you know) “Yeah, you’re lucky you don’t have to wear makeup all the time.” What does this even mean? Is wearing makeup a chore? Is it a burden? Why should someone even feel this way? I’ve spoken to a few of my friends about this, who I never realized felt the shame of wearing “too much makeup” because when they tried a new look, all people could talk about was how they were wearing “so much makeup” or how they had to be going somewhere special to get all “dolled up.” Many people wear makeup to cover up imperfections, but they shouldn’t be made to feel like they HAVE to wear makeup to cover up imperfections, and if they want to do this, that’s OKAY and they shouldn’t be shamed for it- there isn’t enough conversation about this. You’re not any less of “natural” or “real” woman just because you choose/choose not to wear makeup. Whatever your style, makeup is a personal choice and a perfect example of self-expression. Much like fashion, makeup – how much of it you wear or how often you wear it – is totally up to you, and everyone can make that choice in the same way they do picking out a jacket or new pair of sunglasses.

I wasn’t trying to sound preachy in this blog, so I hope I didn’t come across that way. Like many of these blogs, these are a collection of thoughts that have been floating around my mind for awhile; it comes and goes. Basically, I don’t want it to be assumed that because someone likes wearing makeup or chooses to do so, doesn’t mean they’re striving to be a makeup influencer, YouTube makeup star, or instagram famous because they post about it. We like what we like, and I like wearing makeup, and am totally okay with shouting that out loud, or you know, posting about it on social media. I might not be the best contourer in Canada, but I sure do have fun trying to learn, and isn’t that all that matters? I think so! So next time you’re with your gal-pals and anything makeup related comes up, just be a little mindful of the comments you’re making, you might not realize how discouraging it can be. Oh and let’s not make assumptions, you know what they say when you assume…

The Power of Music

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We’ve all had those moments in the car or at home, or even at a party or event where we hear that song and right away we are overcome with memories and emotions; usually about a particular event, time in our life, or perhaps a particular person. More often than not in my own experience, these moments are happy ones that make me smile, laugh, reminisce and even think fondly of the people who are part of those memories. For me (and I am sure most people agree), music has the power to evoke emotion and change my mood, always for the better. The cliche is true in that music is therapy, and lately, I’ve had some artists on repeat (ad nauseam) because I have been thinking about certain people in my life lately and also some specific memories. Thus, I am dedicating this post to some of my favourite artists and will shed some light on what comes to mind when I hear any of their tracks.

Coldplay
Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Coldplay, ever since Parachutes was released in 2000 and I was only 12 years old. Coldplay’s music ignites my soul in a way that no other artist can. When Coldplay is blasting through the speakers, more often than not, I am singing along; belting out the lyrics with passion and emotion. For me, Coldplay holds a special place in my heart for many reasons as their music is tied to many memories and moments in my life with the most important people in my life. Most prominently, I have the best Coldplay associated memories with my husband. Our first dance at our wedding was In My Place off of their A Rush of Blood to the Head album; a song that he also played for me on guitar on our prom night, and the night he proposed to me on my birthday. Our first concert together was Coldplay, and we always listened to Coldplay on our dates when we were hanging out. My husband and I have been together for 14 years, so many of the lines about love resonate with my love for him. I’ve also had some great memories associated with Coldplay’s music with my best friend and a few other close friends too. Some songs have gotten me through some trying times emotionally and life-changing events, other songs are instant joy-boosters for me. Some of my favourite tracks include Don’t Panic, Violet Hill, Fix You, Viva La Vida, The Scientist, The Hardest Part, Every Tear Drop is a Waterfall, Hymn for the Weekend, Everything’s Not Lost, Talk, Ink, and Charlie Brown. I could list so many more, but that’s just a start.

Linkin Park
As I mentioned in my Fashion post, I went through a stage as a teenager where I was very much a skater kid, and with that phase came my introduction to punk and (heavier) rock. Hybrid Theory was, and still is, one of my favourite albums (and in my opinion, the best LP album released- yep Jeffery that is directed to you!). I wasn’t emo (for those who don’t know, look it up) but listening to LP sure let me get out any anger or frustrations I may have been harbouring. I never considered myself to be sad, upset, misunderstood or even angry as a teenager, I have always been quite joyful and happy so I wasn’t listening to LP thinking about all my pain and suffering. In fact, I only have one sad memory associated with Linkin Park, and it has to do with when my cat, Tyson passed away. The day we had to rush him to the vet and put him to rest due to his cancer was the same day that I was going to see Linkin Park in concert. I picked up my friend from the bus station and I actually couldn’t find the words to tell him what had just happened earlier that day. Right away he could tell something was wrong, but I couldn’t talk about it. I contemplated not even going to the concert that night but I knew in my heart that going to the show would be very therapeutic for me and there were songs I absolutely need to hear to align with how I was feeling in that moment. Eventually, I was able to share the news about what had just happened, and hearing those LP songs alongside my best friend really helped. So apart from this one memory, I listen to Linkin Park when I am in the mood for a “happy rage;” a phrase actually coined by me and that same friend who I attended the concert with. When Chester took his life in 2017, it really saddened me. It was the same pain you feel when an important person in your life dies. I know that his death affected me so much because LP was such a part of my teenage life, that it was as though a piece of me was damaged and couldn’t ever be repaired. Some of my favourite tracks include Papercut, Points of Authority, With You, Somewhere I Belong, Faint, Bleed it Out, What I’ve Done, Burn it Down, Iridescent, and Guilty All the Same.

Hall & Oates/Huey Lewis and the News
For the last several years I have been obsessed with 80s music, and obsessed is putting it lightly. I’ve always had an appreciation for “oldies music” – music that came before my time- because growing up with older brothers will do that to you – but also because some of the music out there lately is crap. Oh did I really just say that? Bahaha. Anyway, two of my friends and I have been so into 80s music lately it has consumed our chats and playlists whenever we are together, and yes, we’ve started sending 45-second lip-syncing clips to each other; dare I say we are at the 140+ videos mark? Simply the best! Whenever I hear anything from these two artists, I am instantly in a great mood. These songs remind me of so many special times, like Hydra Wine nights, road tripping to Myrtle Beach, and my friend’s wedding day. I love how timeless these artists are, and I never tire of their songs! Some of my favourite tracks are You Make My Dreams, Kiss on my List, Out of Touch, Man Eater, Private Eyes, The Power of Love, Do You Believe in Love, Stuck with You and If This is It … and I could go on and on!

Before I let this post go on forever and ever, I have to touch on a few songs that hold a special place in my heart because they remind me of my Dad. Bob Seger’s Old Time Rock and Roll is one song that is flooded with memories of my Dad. I recall many truck rides where this song would come on and my Dad and I would be singing along together with the music blasting out the rolled-down truck windows. At every wedding we attended as a family, this song always got my Dad up out of his seat to dance and the dance floor became like a karaoke stage. Jumping Jack Flash and Start Me Up by the Rolling Stones always remind of my Dad for similar reasons to Seger’s hit. American Pie was a song that my Dad played on repeat and always reminded me that it would never lose meaning or get forgotten. One time when my Dad was driving me up to North Bay, we talked for almost two hours straight about what some of these songs meant to him growing up and how they made him feel. What was extra special about this conversation is that my Dad and I didn’t have these types of conversations often; my Dad didn’t open up much, and while we were close when he was still alive, we never had deep conversations like these. Thus, I always think of him whenever I hear these songs.

Because music is so universal, it can be quite fascinating to talk to others about the genres and artists that influence you and flood your heart and soul with memories. We all evolve with time, and sometimes our music tastes change too. Writing this blog and thinking about the music that moves me has been quite an enjoyable experience; it solidifies to me how important some moments are to my life and hearing the songs instantly takes me back to those places in time. What a fascinating experience!

What are some of your favourite musicians or groups? I would love to hear about them in the comments!

Engaging Next Level Friendship

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We’ve all experienced it, often without realizing. That pivotal, official moment when we realize that we have found a friend for keeps. Friendship is such a fascinating concept. Some people use the word “friend” more loosely than others. What does it mean to call someone a friend? Is it just someone you see at group get-togethers? Is it someone you call, text or keep in contact with often?

I have always believed in different levels and tiers of friendship. Sure, I have those people in my life that I only see a few times a year or those people whom I only hang out within a group setting, but I seldom call these people my friends. I have had the unfortunate experience, like I am sure everyone has at least once in their life, of believing that some people were my friends, and they turned out not to be for many reasons. I learned early on that you won’t always get the same effort, love, or attention that you give. We aren’t meant to be best friends or even good friends with everyone in our life. In fact, different relationships serve different purposes. Not every friend is going to be that go-to person we tell everything to, or that we know we can always have fun with regardless of what we are (or are not) doing. There are those friends that we are only going to see at group gatherings because that’s the only time that they show up, or they live far away and it’s hard to find time to hang out. Sometimes, and perhaps more often than we realize, our friendships are not equal. Friendships are not 50/50, nor can they be. We all need different things from our social interactions, engagements and our friendships. When I said above that I learned the hard way about believing people were my friends, when it turned out they weren’t, I wasn’t referring to something they might have done once that was unforgivable to me, I am talking about those friends that you really invest in emotionally, give your time to, are there for them when they are really down and out, and they repay you with unanswered calls, text messages, and never having any time for you. About 5 years ago, I really started eliminating these people from my life, and it was a really great feeling. I spent more time investing in those who were around often, checked up on me often, and really listened when I had something to say. I started thinking more deeply and paying attention to the little things they had done and realized that there was always one event, one act, one moment when that person really proved they care for you a lot; next level friendship mode was engaged…

Now, the real reason I got inspired for this blog post was that I was thinking about a friend of mine who has a birthday coming up soon. I have known this person for a long time and considered myself to be friends with him for many years (since the end of high school in fact, which was 2005/2006). We hung out frequently, had good conversations and laughs, and yes, I really became friends with him first off because he was best friends with my boyfriend (now husband) but I enjoyed his company, always. While we seemed to mostly hang out together in small or large groups, I never doubted that he was my friend. As I said, we had good conversations, had things in common, and it was never dull or awkward to hang out. We did have deep conversations with meaning and our friendship was evolving with time, as all friendships should. Our relationship was great. So when did I know for sure that he was truly a friend for keeps? After all, it’s not like he was going anywhere, he and my husband had been best friends since elementary school, so he was going to be in my life forever.

In 2018 this friend was getting married, and as mentioned in other posts, my husband was the Best Man and I was the Matron of Honour. When we were first asked to be in their wedding party, we accepted with joy, honour, excitement, pride and without any hesitation. When it came time for us to sit down and write out our speech for the wedding night, I had the chance to reflect on my relationship with both the bride and groom as separate individuals. As we sat and talked over the kinds of moments we would touch upon in our speech it became very evident to me, almost as though I was hit in the face with a brogue kick (wrestling reference). I knew that the groom was truly a friend for keeps because of an event that took place in the summer of 2011.

In June of 2011, I graduated from university for the first time. I completed my honours degree and my teaching degree but would embark on a new educational adventure in September when I was beginning my graduate program at Queens. Of course, there was much prep involved before starting school in a new city and it was a process. Being an organized person helped to keep me sane and made things a lot easier. There was an opportunity for me to retrieve my keys for my new apartment a month earlier than I was scheduled to move in, and being that I was working almost every day of the summer to save up for school, I had to take the first day off I could to try and get as many things moved up there as possible. It was very last minute and honestly, I wasn’t expecting anyone to be able to drop everything and help me so last minute; I just assumed I was going to take a carload of things to my new apartment all by myself and that was okay.

A few days before I was going to leave, this friend had texted us to see when we were free to hang out next. I expressed that I only had one day off and that I was going to be gone all day that day because I was moving up some stuff to Kingston. Without hesitation, my friend asked if I wanted some help or needed the company for the drive. I explained that I would be gone all day long so I wouldn’t want to take his whole day, as I didn’t have a planned end time to be home. He insisted on coming to help, and said he didn’t care how many pieces of Ikea furniture he had to assemble, he would be happy to come along. So we were set to go…

The drive to Kingston was the first time he and I had ever been alone together in the car, and while that makes some people uneasy, I was delighted to have that time to get to talk with him 1:1 and have his company. The drive was about 3.5 hours one way, and we bonded over car karaoke and various discussions about life, love and anything else you could think of! I really quite enjoyed the time in the car, and the whole day was filled with fond memories and moments. I was able to show him around Kingston, and we were able to get a lot of my stuff moved in and assembled for my new apartment. What I remember most was talking about the things we had never before; stories of growing up, past relationships and friendships, and future life goals. We talked for hours, not just because we had to, but the conversations kept flowing. He was such a tremendous help with moving, and I had learned so much about him that I never knew before. When we finally left to go home it was very late, but we continued to talk, laugh and crack jokes. It was a very special moment that I am tremendously thankful for. By offering his free time and day to me, he was really offering me so much more.

This experience was when our friendship levelled up and I knew that no matter the circumstance or situation, I could rely on him as a friend; not just because I was dating his best friend, but because we were friends too. Now we have been friends for about 14 years, and I couldn’t imagine my life without him. He and his wife are two of the closest friends my husband and I have, and we adore both of them so much. Thinking about that day in Kingston sparks great conversation and reflection on my relationships with those I adore and love: when was that moment when our friendship engaged to the next level?

If you’re reading this thinking about your own relationships and trying to pinpoint that pivotal moment in a friendship or relationship you have with someone, I encourage you to talk to that person about it. You might find that when they engaged “next level friendship” might be a different time, place and event than yours. It can lead to some really fascinating and meaningful conversation! Just like in video games, you unlock so many cool things when you level up.

So to my friend reading this, if you do, thank you for all your friendship (and for building that Ikea dresser with me; even if we assembled the drawer the wrong way!) Bahaha.

2018: A Year in Review

manda_faromeiro

A few years ago I started a tradition on Facebook; I made the conscious effort to reflect and highlight some of the positive things that I experienced throughout the year. When I started the post, I did so because it seemed that the internet (and almost everyone on it) was having a pretty shitty year. Rather than feed into the negativity, I decided to combat it because even though misery loves company, happiness is contagious! Now I make sure to reflect every year…

As I reminisce about 2018, I recognize that I am quite fortunate. 2018 was truly a marvellous year filled with love, happiness, and important moments and milestones. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for everything that I have experienced this year, and for all the people in my life whom I experienced it with. I won’t touch on everything, but here are some highlights:

Panama 2018

I had the opportunity to travel to Panama with 7 of my closest friends at the beginning of 2018, and it was really a trip of a lifetime! A week in the sun, poolside with some of your best friends was bliss. While in Panama we got to venture into Panama City and travel to a National Park Waterfall. Many laughs were had and the trip was a symbol of the bonds we have built over time, but also as a way to relax and unwind before the business of 2018 would kick into full gear; three of the people in this photo were getting married later on in the year.

Speaking of weddings, I had the utmost privilege to be the Matron of Honour and Best Woman in two of my friends’ weddings this year. Being chosen as the Matron of Honour in our friends’ wedding was extra special because my husband was asked to be the Best Man. For us, the love we have for the couple who got married is hard to summarize into words, thus being asked to be in their wedding was truly heartwarming. We wanted nothing but the best for those two, so we made it our mission to ensure their wedding day (and every event related to it) was everything they wanted and more. Planning a Tea-Party bridal shower was quite fun, especially because High Tea is something special the bride and I started doing together a few years ago. We added an extra dash of fun by making it a Mad Hatter Tea Party Theme…

Bridal Shower – April 2018

Spring 2018 also included road tripping to Myrtle Beach with some fabulous friends. We partook in some golf at Myrtlewood Golf Club, celebrated Cinco de Mayo at one of the best Mexican Restaurants, enjoyed the beach and pool (maybe a little too much), and experienced a very sweet Wine Tour! If you can think about the cliche phrase, “it’s the journey, not the destination” – that basically sums up the road trip to Myrtle Beach. Such an amazing time! I seriously recommend road trips at least once a year…

Golfing in Myrtle Beach

Celebrations in 2018 were not just about getting hitched, many of my friends also turned 30 this year. Birthdays have always been important to me, and I honestly believe that every birthday is worth celebrating because you never know what birthday might be your last. Sorry to be a downer here, but birthdays should be celebrated, whether that means treating yourself to something small or throwing a huge bash; whatever you wish! 2018 was filled with many fun-themed birthdays including Medieval Times, Old School Dances, Carnivals, and Road Trips to Ottawa!

  • Medieval Birthdays
  • 30th Birthday Dances
  • Life’s a Circus – Birthday Bash

Turning 30 was memorable for me because it gave me the chance to really appreciate everything that I have accomplished in my life so far. Apart from having an amazing husband, a wonderfully supportive family, and a supreme squad of friends, I am thankful for the continued opportunity to work with my family in Real Estate, while also being able to continue influencing young minds through my academic mentoring and tutoring. I’ve been working since I was 12, so knowing that I wake up every day and enjoy going to work is satisfying. I want my work to be meaningful and fulfilling but I don’t ever want it to make me miserable. Thus, I often reflect on how lucky I am to have work that is low-stress.

I will now touch upon the three weddings that I attended this year. As I mentioned above, I had the honour of being the Matron of Honour and Best Woman in two of the weddings, but the third wedding was also very important to me. Someone very special in my life was getting married, and he decided to do so on his birthday- what madness! It was an extra special day, and I was privileged to attend as a guest. I don’t know how to put into words how much I love all the people who got married in 2018, so I can only hope that they really do know how much I care for them. Being able to be with all of them on their wedding days and create new memories on is really priceless. Especially when you get to be in a room with so many people who love them too! I don’t think I ever danced or laughed or smiled as much as I did at these 2018 weddings…

  • July 21st, 2018
August 4th, 2018
  • September 29th, 2018

Overall, 2018 was a fantastic year. It was filled with laughter, love, adventure and memories. 2018 made some of my friends new parents, or parents again, and getting to witness these people take on these new roles is exciting. 2018 granted me the honour of being a 3x Auntie, as a new nephew was born into the family. 2018 reminded me why it is so important to be your truest self, to tell those who are important to you when they’ve upset, hurt or disappointed you, but to also tell those same people that you love them and why you do. 2018 taught me how adulting can really be fun, as my husband and I were able to do some additional renovations to our home, like completely finishing our basement!

2018 was a very good year, and I am glad that so many positive things happened in my life. Thanks for the memories! 2019, if you’re even half as good as 2018 was, I can’t wait to write about it.